By IB6UB9 - 28/11/2009 17:32 - United States

Today, I woke up and looked in the mirror and noticed that my face was covered in glitter. I asked my wife about it and she said she put it on me while I was sleeping so that I would sparkle like Edward from Twilight when I'm in the sunlight. FML
I agree, your life sucks 66 158
You deserved it 6 974
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

TheLoneWolf87 4

We seriously need a Who Gives A Damn About Twilight feature on FML.

44 4

Comments

Skyline969 1

Definitely grounds for a divorce IMO. Maybe not realistically, but that's downright creepy. Here's what to do - give her a water bra that'll bring her chest up to about a D, and tell her you just want her to be more like Pamela Anderson. Ahh, revenge. =P

4 0
Ashimali 0

you know, i normally wouldn't condone something like that, but in this case i think its completely necessary, if for no other reason than to get your point across

1 0
i_luv_cheese 0

wtf did you marry an early-mid teenage girl?

1 0
Matchie 0

I think we need to shut up about Twilight. There are thousands of Twilight fans. This fact will not go away no matter how much you hate Twilight. There will always be someone who likes Twilight, and rightfully so. If a 14 year old girl, or a 28 year old guy for that matter, likes Twilight, what gives you the right to try and spoil that for them? Wouldn't it piss you off if your favorite book/movie/song/whatever was constantly being torn down? Yeah it would, assholes. :]

2 8
BaghdadAssUp 0

Too bad our favorite book/movie/ whatever, ****, etc isn't as bad as Twilight where we would need to glitter our boyfriend/husband's face to make them sparkle.

2 1
DameGreyWulf 0

Seriously. I like Jurassic Park, an actually INTELLIGENT book, and I'm not about to dress any partner up like a god damn t-rex ... oh **** now I've gone and got ideas. Oh no wait it's more funny than sexy, nevermind.

1 0
FerrariCake 2

#46... no one is actually ripping on "Twilight". Rational people rip on the stupid things that Twilight "fans" do because they can't tell the difference between reality and the obviously fictional world presented in the book. None of these FMLs or the accompanying comments are about the characters or events in the books (or movies)... they are all about the stupid things people do in their effort to bring the fantasy story into reality. I'm sure the author of the series would rip on the same "Twilight fans", but she's keeping quiet because she's making millions off of them. ps... Gladiator is one of my favorite movies, but I'm not trying to dress anyone up like a Roman gladiator. And you can rip on it all you like. I don't care, it's just a movie.

5 0
DameGreyWulf 0

There's a little saying that goes... "You can hardly call yourself a fan if you can't joke about your fandom."

0 0
KarmaLanding 0

Hell with t-rexes... VELOCIRAPTORS, BABY!!!!

0 0
Sapphy 0

wow... I would be pissed. and what the hell.. I thought only middle school kids were retarded enough to like twilight... the only thing that looked good was for the movie new moon. the wolves look so amazing that in a way it actually pissed me off. it pissed me off because something that looked so cool was in something so stupid. and usually animated wolves look like crap. and TRUE VAMPIRES DONT ******* SPARKLE *rawwr*

3 0
picturetaker 0

I read twilight and I didn't take it seriously. it's a book with fictional characters. I also love owl city and the postal service.

1 0
aback 4

Offer to duct tape her boobs together so she'll have cleavage like a **** queen.

1 0
fagtastic_iva 5

really sucks to be you dude. If she does it again, consider divorce

0 0
cleovany 0

I love Edward and Jacob, but your wife is going just a little too far. O.o Creeepy. :P

0 3
DeathByFalchion 0

Now you have reason to bite her and make her bleed. Go do it.

0 0