Love: Today, I went to the movies on a date. My chair made a fart sound... - FML

By Whyme - 09/01/2012 06:14 - United States

Today, I went to the movies on a date. My chair made a fart sound while I moved around a little, so my date thought I'd let one rip. He then let out a really horrendously smelling one to make me feel less embarrassed, giving me a reassuring look. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 283

You deserved it 6 490

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Same thing different taste

Great date, thanks!

By Anonymous - 28/03/2009 18:50 - United States

Today, I was on a first date with a girl at the movies. Trying to be polite, I held in a fart until an intense, loud action scene came on. As soon as I let go, the scene went silent and my fart was clearly heard to everyone in the movie theatre. My date went to the bathroom. She didn't come back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 974

You deserved it 83 971

The Sweet Smell of Success

By let ‘Er rip - 13/10/2019 16:00

Today, I was out on my first date in months. My stomach didn’t feel quite right after dinner, but I tried to ignore it. During the movie, it got so bad I decided to try to sneak a small fart for relief. As soon as I did, the theater fell dead silent. My fart practically echoed in the silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 699

You deserved it 581

By Anonymous - 27/09/2010 11:45 - United States

Today, I went on a first date to the movies. During the flick, I choked on a piece of popcorn. I took a gulp of soda and that got stuck as well. I finally got my breath back and let out the loudest burp I ever have. He looked at me and said, "Does this mean I can fart now?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 614

You deserved it 30 204

By thecarisfine - 14/03/2015 04:27 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, while on a date, I desperately let out a stealth fart in my date's car. I didn't have the nerve to own up to it, even as he started panicking and thinking the smell was coming from his engine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 895

You deserved it 8 340

By tmac05 - 13/11/2010 05:13 - United States

Today, the waiter farted while I was on a date. My date thought it was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 836

You deserved it 3 011

By Smirky - 13/02/2017 02:30 - India - Bangalore

Today, while walking down the aisle of a movie theatre, I passed gas so loudly that the audience missed the climax of the film laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 638

You deserved it 1 718

By anonymous - 17/12/2011 02:06 - United States

Today, I went to the movies with my friends. All throughout, some guy kept making weird sounds and breathing deeply. Midway through the movie, he got even louder. Just as I was about to snap, chunks of vomit sprayed over my chair and shoulders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 023

You deserved it 2 518

Maybe he's into that...

By pissypants - 25/11/2017 19:00

Today, at the movies on a date, I drank all my soda and waited too long. I couldn't take it anymore and quickly got up, knocking my dates popcorn on the floor, and ran to the bathroom. I didn’t make it and went home in shame. It’s better he thinks I stood him up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 140

You deserved it 3 500

By sheyo - 05/03/2009 01:13 - Canada

Today, I went to the movies with some girlfriends. The guy behind us was making these pervy, heavy breathing noises, so we threw some popcorn at him. When the movie finished, we saw him in a wheelchair - with a breathing tube sticking out of his neck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 501

You deserved it 315 064

My body hates me

By HappilyNeverAfter - 18/09/2014 03:14 - Canada - Port Perry

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 834

You deserved it 5 272

Next

Top comments

Lauren324 18

Monday 9 January 2012 11:59

That's sweet, in a disgusting way...

Amrel 10

Monday 9 January 2012 12:01

The next step to loving a man, is to love his farts

Comments

lilcutie00 0

Monday 9 January 2012 21:45

That's really funny. and nice. Kind of.

chels1994 11

Monday 9 January 2012 21:50

He meant well lol

st3lios89 0

Monday 9 January 2012 21:52

I smell the beginning of a great relationship.

babyontheway1991 7

Monday 9 January 2012 22:22

awe thats actually really cute, in a gross way :)

wutzup 0

Monday 9 January 2012 22:27

Hes a keeper

ashleykay94 7

Monday 9 January 2012 22:47

He's a keeper :)

day624 14

Monday 9 January 2012 23:29

Aw love at first squeak/fart

blink978 1

Monday 9 January 2012 23:58

So true

tinybear93 0

Monday 9 January 2012 23:58

I'd marry him.

laurencheese 7

Tuesday 10 January 2012 0:03

he's def a keeper.

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The Top

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Today, my step-dad was talking about how he was raised in Las Vegas, telling stories about him and his buddies, until he stopped, looked right at my mom and said, "Find her, feed her, f*ck her, forget her. But I never forgot your mom, that's how I stole her from your dad." FML

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 269

You deserved it 1 492

Today, my girlfriend found a letter I'd written to myself for moral support while we were broken up, in which I explained why we would never work out. Apparently I made a convincing argument. FML

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You deserved it 37 899

Today, my girlfriend openly admitted to me that she wouldn't have gone out with me if she hadn't been drunk. FML

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You deserved it 4 182

Today I was watching a gameplay of an Otome (a female dating sim game), where the main character tells her love interest that, “Tasty food is the simplest and most tangible happiness” and “Good food drives away sadness.” I have been half starving myself for 6 months because of body image issues. FML

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You deserved it 394

Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed with a pedestal fan on facing us when my boyfriend sneezed. Where did he sneeze? Into the fan, which then sprayed it all over my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 286

You deserved it 3 971