Miscellaneous: Today, I went to eat out. When I sat down, I realized I forgot...

By pplsuck - 25/09/2012 23:57 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I went to eat out. When I sat down, I realized I forgot my straw. I took my purse with me, not wanting it to get stolen. Someone stole my food instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 312

You deserved it 2 774

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Same thing different taste

Smooth

By HungryGirl - 24/10/2009 14:45 - United States

Today, I went to McDonald's to get breakfast. I sat my food down at a table and went to get some napkins and a straw. I returned to the table to find that my food was gone, and could hear nothing but "SUCKKAAAA" trailing from the entrance to the restaurant. Some jerk stole my meal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 516

You deserved it 9 791

By ashleyevans - 04/04/2009 14:45 - United States

Today, my friend and I went to a really expensive restaurant. We got really bad service, so halfway through the meal we decided to dine-and-dash. Turns out I left my purse in the restaurant. With my I.D. and everything inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 000

You deserved it 191 982

By Aaron - 14/05/2009 21:23 - United States

Today, I walked to my local McDonald's. I spent the last 7 dollars I had on my meal. As I began to walk back to my dorm, I was mugged. I explained to them I had no money, so they stole my food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 129

You deserved it 3 729

By dancer_2014 - 28/05/2011 12:44 - United States

Today, I was on my first blind date. We went to a fancy restaurant in the middle in the city. After using the bathroom, I came back to an empty table. He stole my purse and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 239

You deserved it 16 309

By Anonymous - 15/07/2009 15:57 - United States

Today, I went to see a movie. After getting my seat, I went out to get food. Coming back, I saw the security guard. Thinking he would ask me for my ticket, I moved all the food to one hand to get the ticket in my pocket. I spilled it all. He didn't ask to see it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 128

You deserved it 16 612

Assumptions

By Hahamaster333 - 28/03/2013 01:02

Today, I was at the pool when I saw a man eating the food I had ordered near my seat. I immediately ran up to him and asked him to stop stealing my food. I took the food away and threw it in the trash. Seconds later the attendant came out with my actual food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 830

You deserved it 75 404

By Anonymous - 17/08/2012 16:45 - United States - Brighton

Today, while on vacation with my family, my mother told me to put my phone in her purse, so it wouldn't get stolen. Someone stole her purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 218

You deserved it 2 235

Sticky situation

By CodyS - 03/09/2013 05:03 - United States - Rocky River

Today, on my lunch break, I ran to the gas station, and threw some trash away on my way in. On my way out, I realized my keys were missing. Thinking I threw them away, and fearing that I'd be late returning to work, I tore through the disgusting trash only to find my keys on the seat of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 212

You deserved it 11 277

By Fuck irony - 29/10/2017 10:00 - United States - Binghamton

Today, I was volunteering at a soup kitchen and was advised to leave my wallet and cell phone in my car so they wouldn’t be stolen. Someone broke into my car and stole them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 988

You deserved it 501

By tannerrosetx_1 - 06/04/2015 11:44 - United States - Irving

Today, I was pickpocketed. I didn't realize until I stopped to get breakfast. I went back home to see that my dog had taken my wallet and had ripped and torn it up. I was pickpocketed by my own dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 123

You deserved it 3 722

TheMaster15 10

Wednesday 26 September 2012 8:52

They've got their priorities straight!

alexhaz64 4

Wednesday 26 September 2012 8:56

Glad you learned your lesson from the time your potential employer convinced you to leave your purse in his office!

Comments

FreddyyyyK 2

Wednesday 26 September 2012 16:58

What would you want stolen: Your food or your purse you have all your stuff in? Good decision to take your purse with you :)

kcor1176 0

Wednesday 26 September 2012 17:56

Wow what city are you from?

sandinthewaves 5

Wednesday 26 September 2012 19:12

Good thing you grabbed the purse

SkyyEatsAirplane 11

Wednesday 26 September 2012 19:19

Why would you ever leave your food alone? That's the dumbest idea ever

FoyLiMo 0

Wednesday 26 September 2012 21:26

all I can say is bahahahahahahaha

PhishloverA 14

Wednesday 26 September 2012 21:37

Those fat asses will do anything to get extra food. I hope you got a free meal after that

Spottedfeather 7

Wednesday 26 September 2012 22:15

Because you couldn't have possibly just drank the soda without a straw ?

222004801 4

Thursday 27 September 2012 0:09

Well it's a good thing you brought your purse because most likely if you left that too, it would have been stolen.

TurkeySlab 9

Thursday 27 September 2012 2:03

Your straw??!?!?

cannonfodder 12

Thursday 27 September 2012 2:16

McDonalds just isnt what it used to be....

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The Top

Today, my fiancée's ex sent me screenshots of their conversation. In it, he told her how badly he’d wanted to marry her, what a great life he'd have given her, and what a huge mistake she'd made by letting him get away. My ring, our house even our pets should’ve been hers. Gee, thanks for settling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 168

You deserved it 134

Today, my boss fired me because someone hacked our website and replaced pictures of our products with furry porn (don’t Google it, it’s weird as fuck). We don’t have an IT department, but since I spend the most time on the computer controlling stock and purchases, he blamed me instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 661

You deserved it 161

The Top

Today, my mother still refuses to acknowledge my son as her grandson, all because I had a C-section, which she says is unnatural and against God's will. I only had the C-section in the first place for health reasons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 639

You deserved it 1 179

Today, my boyfriend fell asleep during phone sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 335

You deserved it 28 315

Today, while shopping, a few giggling girls came up to me and asked why I was wearing a dress in public. Highly confused, I didn't answer. When they walked away laughing, I realized they thought I was a man. I'm a woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 461

You deserved it 4 157

Today, I received my employee ID, which I have to wear at all times at my new job. The only problem is that in my photo, I look like a donkey having a seizure. Customers keep snickering at it, and my boss thinks I posed like that deliberately. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 814

You deserved it 4 576

Today, my pre-teen brother has started using the entire Axe line because he believes that it will give him an "edge with the ladies". He insists on using the products at least three times a day, including before bedtime. I'm allergic to anything that is perfumed. We share a room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 634

You deserved it 3 614

Today, I went to my girlfriend's house and caught her digging for gold. She wasn't picking her nose - she was literally trying to dig for gold in her backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 506

You deserved it 3 076

Same thing different taste

Smooth

Assumptions

Sticky situation

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