Health: Today, I went on my first ever assisted skydive. I fainted after...

By Fuperman - 02/06/2013 23:14 - France - Illange

Today, I went on my first ever assisted skydive. I fainted after we jumped, and only came to as we touched the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 674

You deserved it 6 728

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Same thing different taste

Not cut out for this

By Anonymous - 18/12/2016 02:10

Today, I took my girlfriend skydiving for her birthday. I insisted on joining her to make it a memory for us both, despite my fear of heights. I passed out twice mid-freefall and had to be saved by the instructor both times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 798

You deserved it 1 402

By scardeycat13 - 08/01/2012 05:38 - United States

Today, I went snowboarding for the first time. I was so scared I passed out. I was only on the kiddy hill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 254

You deserved it 10 739

By Anonymous - 04/12/2015 20:36 - United States - Silver Spring

Today, my friend took me tandem skydiving. When it was time to jump, he began crying, said he'd cut our parachute cords, then said "Goodbye, cruel world!" and pushed me off the plane with him strapped to my back. I pissed myself and cried like a bitch. He thinks his "prank" was hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 093

You deserved it 2 930

By Erica - 08/07/2013 17:27 - United States - Mountain View

Today, my boyfriend and I were out cliff jumping, when for the first time, he told me he loved me. I panicked and pushed him over the edge and into the water. He's now in hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 625

You deserved it 72 513

Sick moves, bro

By Fish - 19/03/2009 15:47 - United Arab Emirates

Today, we were hanging around the pool with a couple of friends and a crush of mine. Thinking I would be able to impress her with a well-performed dive off the diving board, I went up and attempted my best dive. I slipped as I jumped, hitting my head on the board. I had to be saved by the lifeguard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 299

You deserved it 55 362

By Alyssa Charlotte - 29/07/2011 02:25 - Mexico

Today, after being terrified for years, I went on a plane for the first time. It was also the first time I "emergency landed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 301

You deserved it 3 032

By Emcee - 05/06/2009 10:48 - Philippines

Today, it was graduation day, and the very first time I was hosting an event. When I got on stage, I stared at the audience for a good 5 seconds, then fainted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 632

You deserved it 6 168

High flying old bird

By Anonymous - 08/04/2023 04:00

Today, while on vacation with my family, I went parasailing. Just as I was about to take off, the wind picked up and I got blown off course. I ended up crashing into a boat and had to be rescued by the coastguard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 672

You deserved it 103

By katiekat - 05/01/2010 20:24 - United States

Today, my ex looked at me for the first time in months. I felt like I could fly. Seconds later my flight ended. I fell down the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 951

You deserved it 12 652

By poolfail - 06/08/2014 21:14

Today, at the pool, I decided to face my fears and go off the high dive. I slipped off the edge and did a barrel roll into the pool while screaming like a little girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 092

You deserved it 6 541

cchan034 23

Monday 3 June 2013 5:25

Good thing it was "assisted"

Eliseopwns 22

Monday 3 June 2013 5:24

Thank god you're not dead.

Comments

andrew_bellati 11

Monday 3 June 2013 5:31

If you weren't assisted you would be dead, I would be kissing his/her feet right now not posting an FML.

missamberrose 17

Monday 3 June 2013 6:38

Most chutes now a days automatically open after a certain period of time because a lot of people faint the first time.

supercowguy 5

Monday 3 June 2013 5:32

I agree if it wasn't assisted, well I don't even want to think about what would have happened...

Welshite 39

Monday 3 June 2013 5:33

You make an awful superhero, Fuperman...

MrBoredomioo 18

Monday 3 June 2013 5:33

Beats what would have happened to me, with my luck. I would have had my friends come with me and shove me off, because they're all dicks.

Welshite 39

Monday 3 June 2013 5:39

That has nothing to do with luck. If your friends would willingly risk your life like that, you need new friends.

skitsmuffin 6

Monday 3 June 2013 5:39

Try a more calm hobby like gardening or couponing.

fuckedPriceless 17

Monday 3 June 2013 5:41

Look on the bright side, if it wasn't assisted you would be dead.

AzWolf 5

Monday 3 June 2013 5:45

Skydiving is fun, huh!

zenrael 21

Monday 3 June 2013 5:49

The groupon skydiving experience.

seniorchang 16

Monday 3 June 2013 5:55

Is that the Wronski Feint?

ltaper11 20

Monday 3 June 2013 5:55

I'm faaaaaaallllllliiiinnnn...oh what happened?

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 44 451

You deserved it 3 567

Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 680

You deserved it 7 123

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1 162

You deserved it 277

Today, out of habit, I said "See you later" to a creepy old male customer who stared at my chest the whole time I was serving him. His response was to wink and say, "Oh, you will." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 831

You deserved it 5 199

Today, I enjoyed the soft caressing touch of the person I'm attracted to. It would have been even better if he weren't simply stroking my arm hair in amazement at its superior length and density. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 043

You deserved it 5 067

Today, apparently according to my parents, since they raised me, it gives them the right to use the money I worked hard for, and there’s nothing I can do about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 054

You deserved it 108

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I agree, your life sucks 29 285

You deserved it 8 017

Today, after a church service, a man approached me as I was walking to my car. He had tears in his eyes and politely asked if I would pray with him. He asked if we could hold hands. As I reached out to hold his hands, the bitch snatched my purse and ran. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 534

You deserved it 8 825

Same thing different taste

Not cut out for this

Sick moves, bro

High flying old bird

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