Health: Today, I was really psyched to go see Kung Fu Panda 2 at the...

By Anonymous - 28/05/2011 00:56 - United States

Today, I was really psyched to go see Kung Fu Panda 2 at the movies. Excited, I tried to do a flying kick off the cafeteria wall at work. Instead of kicking off, my leg crashed through the plasterboard and got stuck. My co-workers had to pull me free. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 117

You deserved it 53 928

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Same thing different taste

By blahblah - 27/06/2013 01:57 - United States - Richardson

Today, I decided to try Karate. In an attempt to roundhouse-kick a hanging boxing glove, I knocked over a lamp, lost my balance and pulled down my curtains. My neighbor then looked through the window, started laughing and yelled, "KUNG FO POWA!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 414

You deserved it 35 729

Score!

By zwillywilly - 10/08/2009 04:03 - United States

Today, I was working in a warehouse where fellow employees were kicking empty boxes around. Seeing a box, I got running distance and kicked it as hard as I could, only to look up in horror to see that I had kicked into our CEO's face. I still had both my arms up in score mode. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 568

You deserved it 50 581

By Anonymous - 19/11/2017 01:30

Today, I actually slipped on a banana peel, cartoon-style, breaking my kneecap and dislocating my hip. I will never hear the end of this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 116

You deserved it 358

By gmian - 06/12/2015 05:06 - United States - Amherst

Today, at work, I used my foot to flush the toilet, lost my balance, and ended up catching myself with my foot in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 379

You deserved it 11 002

Pranksters

By dan - 09/05/2012 20:10 - United States - Laurel

Today, I started my new job. It seems my colleagues are moronic pranksters, because when I leaned back in my chair, the backrest came apart and I fell to the ground, to much laughter. My boss immediately shouted at me to, "Stop fucking about." I thought this only happened in movies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 173

You deserved it 2 174

By Anonymous - 29/03/2016 16:27 - United States - Bedford

Today, I was working out and doing box jumps. My friend thought it would be funny to kick the box aside as I tried to jump onto it. Now I have 2 broken teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 393

You deserved it 1 561

By burnedboy - 18/01/2010 19:39 - United States

Today, I saw Avatar in iMax 3D. Towards the end of the movie I jump, yelled, and spilled my drink all over the people in front of me because I thought a burning piece of ash landed on my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 617

You deserved it 44 588

By HeadStillHurts - 26/10/2016 11:43

Today, I tried to impress a group of friends by jumping a set of stairs on my skateboard. I didn't realize the ceiling dropped down towards the bottom of the stairs and knocked myself out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 675

You deserved it 8 807

By Anonymous - 11/07/2010 18:18 - United States

Today, I was at the movies with my boyfriend when I really had to pee. I tried to get out of the aisle in a hurry so I wouldn't disturb anyone when I tripped, landing on the people in the row in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 730

You deserved it 5 469

By Anonymous - 04/04/2015 14:35 - France - Melesse

Today, at work, I tripped and fell face-first into a food display. As I picked myself up, totally humiliated, I tripped again and fell right back into it, earning a bunch of pitying looks from nearby customers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 629

You deserved it 3 797

ThatSucksAlotYDI 0

Saturday 28 May 2011 5:54

good going, dipshit

icyfire617 10

Saturday 28 May 2011 5:57

wow.. I'm 13 and even I'm not that excited to see that movie.

Comments

baby_gore 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 2:58

haha dragonball is sooo much cooler than Kung fu panda.

jmac82 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 3:03

could you be any more of a ******* loser?!? you totally deserve this

Mish44 3

Sunday 29 May 2011 3:29

bahaha

Vaesive 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 4:08

Moron, ydi

bjamin343 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 4:30

smooth move jackass

Aubii_07 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 5:00

Hey you sound like one of those grown men who lives in their moms basement till their 35 :D

BeachSurfer94 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 5:54

you fail already for wanting to see Kung Fu panda 2

gondor17 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 6:00

wait. at work? how old are you exactly?

S4ndsurph3r 4

Sunday 29 May 2011 6:23

sounds like a youtube video i saw

That0therguy 4

Sunday 29 May 2011 8:34

And that's the story of some overly exited fat person.

Keywords

Gamers Love Video games Weird Gross Health First Dates Smells Technology Parents Kids Annoying Jealousy Dogs Animals AITA Pranks Dreams Family Geek Gun control Relatable Money Amazon Birthday Cute Awkward Abuse Scams Social Media

The Top

Today, I drove to a job interview. I had to sneeze, but because I was driving on the highway, I didn't let go of the wheel to cover my mouth. I didn't know the sneeze was a "productive" one until I was sitting in the interview, looked down at my new blouse, and saw the giant lugie sitting there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 411

You deserved it 8 930

Today, a police officer pulled me over while I was riding my high performance motorbike. He asked if I knew why he'd pulled me over. It was too tempting to resist at the time, but in hindsight telling him ,“Because I let you?” was not the best idea I’ve ever had. Cops have no sense of humour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 116

You deserved it 663

The Top

Today, I got bailed out of jail. I was there because I saw a girl being hit by her boyfriend. I rushed over to help only to have her hit me repeatedly. The cops came and she blamed her bruises on me. The boyfriend corroborated her story. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 261

You deserved it 3 130

Today, I picked the treadmill next to an old man so I could feel better about myself. He ran faster and longer than I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 059

You deserved it 36 575

Today, after months of job hunting, I started a new job in a deli. I've been a vegetarian since I was 13, but it was the only job I could find. Turns out, I'm allergic to the preservatives they use, as my fingers now resemble sausages. Guess it's time to start job hunting again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 827

You deserved it 4 396

Today, I told my therapist that I read FML for relaxation and entertainment. She asked what FML is, then told me stop reading this website, as my life is bad enough, knowing other's experiences would actually increase my level of anxiety. FML

I agree, your life sucks 682

You deserved it 196

Today, I went to the store to buy new blankets and a comforter. A cute guy started chatting with me and asked about the new bedroom decor. I lied and said I just had a major break up and needed new things, instead of admitting I was too lazy to dig out and wash my winter blankets from last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 842

You deserved it 3 319

Today, I was fired from my job because I, in my boss's words, "Abided by company policy to such an extent that customers were starting to hate me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 027

You deserved it 1 277

Same thing different taste

Score!

Pranksters

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