By horsefuck - 07/08/2015 12:51 - Malaysia - Kuala Lumpur

Spicy
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend, when I noticed a large piece of broccoli wedged between her teeth. I have no idea how she didn't feel it, but I couldn't stop fixating on it and started going soft. I had to cry out, fake an orgasm, then toss the condom really quickly to spare her feelings. FML
I agree, your life sucks 27 552
You deserved it 6 871

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Or tell her she has broccoli in her teeth

If you had have told her, she probably would have thought nothing of it, fixed the problem, and you could have had a real ****** instead of faking it

Comments

Just tell her. If you're close enough to be having sex you should be able to say you have food in your teeth abs have a laugh about it.

Why didn't you just tell her, yall could have laughed about it and move on? You're lame

It makes me crazy when one person cares for another - at least enough to be intimate- but doesn't have common decency to let that person know that something isn't right. Or does it embarrass YOU? If so, reevaluate & grow up. We're all humans. Our bodies do stupid things sometimes. If we can't count on our people to point things out to us, what's the point of you!?

Time to change positions. Problem solved.

Great, so now because you didn't just tell her she'll probably have that for the rest of the day. Finally, she'll look in the mirror and she'll be mortified. When really, it's extremely simple to notify her. YDI.

Buddy, if the two of you are comfortable enough around each other to have sex but still too awkward to tell each other something like "hold on, there's something right there," it might not hurt to reevaluate your relationship. Or your definition of "girlfriend."

steam_engenius 21

She was probably faking it already if she didn't notice you getting soft. Or she didn't want to embarrass you and tell you she noticed. Sounds like you've got more than one issue here.

And then you say hey I bought you flowers And then you say wait a minute Sally I think I got somethin in my teeth Could you get it out for me That's ******* teamwork!

I mean personally i would have appreciated that a lot. I would have felt so stupid i wouldnt have wanted to have sex. I just hope he told her she had broccoli there before she left the house. So no one else would see it