Kids: Today, I told my 4-year-old neighbor that I'm pregnant. His response...

By Baby eater - 20/05/2014 00:00 - United States - Clarksville

Today, I told my 4-year-old neighbor that I'm pregnant. His response was to attack me with a stick "for swallowing a baby." Three people had to pull him off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 498

You deserved it 5 830

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

This boy

By GirlinGreen - 30/04/2009 01:34 - United States

Today, I was babysitting a four year-old. He was mad and began hitting me. I told him to use his words not his fists when he's mad. He then began telling me how much he hated me, and that I should go die and never come back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 443

You deserved it 18 509

By Anonymous - 17/09/2014 21:57 - United States - Dewitt

Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 546

You deserved it 4 689

By poormom - 27/06/2009 04:05 - United States

Today, I told to my son that I'm pregnant. After I'd told him, he looked up and yelled, "Fuck this shit!" and walked out of the room. My son is nine years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 080

You deserved it 28 903

Straight to jail

By anon - 15/07/2011 01:51 - United States

Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 997

You deserved it 70 931

By Anonymous - 16/09/2014 17:44 - Netherlands - Haarlem

Today, my husband and I broke the news that I'm pregnant. Our 8-year-old son's reactions so far have been crying inconsolably, trying to punch me in the stomach, and swearing that he won't let me give him a brother or sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 017

You deserved it 5 261

By mandy - 10/04/2009 15:35 - United States

Today, I was babysitting my neighbor's kid. We were playing in the yard, when he fell and got a small scratch on his leg. I gasp, and he takes a huge breath in and yells, "FUUUCK!!!" as loud as possible. The parents thought it was me, and the mother slapped me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 267

You deserved it 3 557

Not her fault neither mine

By Shut up loser! - 02/12/2019 03:00

Today, my 4 year old daughter got royally annoyed at my uncle who won't stop surprise tickling her by poking her waist. When he went for another, she punched him square on the nose, making him a laughing stock. Not accepting that he got owned, he started preaching about child discipline to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 520

You deserved it 461

By imnotastranger - 09/05/2014 03:01

Today, I was teaching my 4 year old daughter how to use "stranger danger". Later that day, we went out and since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming "STRANGER DANGER!" A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 617

You deserved it 6 929

Hellooooo, Social Services?

By whatisthisshit - 17/03/2017 00:00

Today, I spent two hours convincing my 3-year-old son that he can't poop on his 4-month-old brother out of retaliation for the baby pooping on him. He did it anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 459

You deserved it 712

Rite of passage

By tortilla - 28/11/2020 16:58 - United States - Petaluma

Today, I got punched after telling my 11-year-old cousin that her period is "coming for her." FML

I agree, your life sucks 263

You deserved it 1 244

omgitsmoe 26

Tuesday 20 May 2014 11:01

Why did you eat that baby ?

froggyjade 16

Tuesday 20 May 2014 11:02

3 people? That's one strong 4 year old

Comments

spignona84 11

Wednesday 21 May 2014 0:27

Yeah my neighbor is 4 too

vdwalex6298 1

Wednesday 21 May 2014 0:49

He's a little congressman!

iamthunder 4

Wednesday 21 May 2014 2:52

Should of swallowed him as well, if he's that rude I'm sure his parents wouldn't mind.

DemosthenesMB 13

Wednesday 21 May 2014 2:51

And that's how babies are made :3

wvcheesehead 13

Wednesday 21 May 2014 3:08

Be pro life and pro swallowing.

PeachiePrincess 16

Wednesday 21 May 2014 4:22

Haha, the innocence of small children never fails to amuse me!

cbroady0529 9

Wednesday 21 May 2014 7:54

And this is why I will be honest with my kids as they ask me questions about body parts, sex, and where babies come from. As they age they'll get more details but there's no reason a 4 year old should be beating a pregnant woman for "eating a baby".