Rite of passage - FML

Rite of passage

By tortilla - 28/11/2020 16:58 - United States - Petaluma

Today, I got punched after telling my 11-year-old cousin that her period is "coming for her." FML

I agree, your life sucks 263

You deserved it 1 244

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Same thing different taste

By brittbrat4 - 13/08/2011 06:51 - United States

Today, I was teasing my 12 year old little cousin about him liking my best friend. I guess it made him mad because he yelled "Breast cancer!" at the top of his lungs before power-punching my right boob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 304

You deserved it 36 621

They hated her because she spoke the truth

By Anonymous - 21/08/2021 06:01

Today, I threw a pillow at my 8 year-old cousin while play-fighting. She gave me a look, then muttered, "You don't have any girlfriends and the girls that talk to you probably have no taste." FML

I agree, your life sucks 768

You deserved it 105

Observational comedy

By Anonymous - 17/09/2020 22:59

Today, I, an insecure high school student, told my 11-year-old sister that I got my period in third grade. She responded with, “What?! Then how come you didn’t have tits until last year?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 047

You deserved it 167

By teardrops - 21/09/2010 08:50 - Australia

Today, I got punched in the face by a girl for asking if she was okay after I had seen her crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 490

You deserved it 5 185

Weird family

By Anonymous - 31/08/2022 04:00

Today, my cousin tried to hit on me. I told him that was inappropriate and pushed him off me. He was offended when I went to tell my folks. All they said was, “That’s fine. You should’ve let him.” Um, what? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 209

You deserved it 102

Not her fault neither mine

By Shut up loser! - 02/12/2019 03:00

Today, my 4 year old daughter got royally annoyed at my uncle who won't stop surprise tickling her by poking her waist. When he went for another, she punched him square on the nose, making him a laughing stock. Not accepting that he got owned, he started preaching about child discipline to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 520

You deserved it 461

By Baby eater - 20/05/2014 00:00 - United States - Clarksville

Today, I told my 4-year-old neighbor that I'm pregnant. His response was to attack me with a stick "for swallowing a baby." Three people had to pull him off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 498

You deserved it 5 830

By It was the 11 year old - 21/07/2012 08:00 - United States - Austin

Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 902

You deserved it 5 030

By uterurist - 22/11/2014 18:37 - United States - Saint Paul

Today, my son trained his little sister to walk up to strangers and whimper: "My mommy punches me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 846

You deserved it 2 909

By J - 11/02/2016 15:44 - Malta - Piet?

Today, my sister punched me in the face. My dad was actually annoyed with me when I told him. He said I'll never be a "real man" if I can't take a hit from a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 293

You deserved it 3 291

Next

Top comments

ahabsfan 14

Sunday 29 November 2020 2:26

The period may be coming but PMS may have already arrived.

BurnInDemonFire 33

Monday 30 November 2020 7:33

"It was after the fifth blow... or maybe the sixth... that I realized I probably should have kept my mouth shut. At least then I'd have all my teeth."

Comments

ahabsfan 14

Sunday 29 November 2020 2:26

The period may be coming but PMS may have already arrived.

BurnInDemonFire 33

Monday 30 November 2020 7:33

"It was after the fifth blow... or maybe the sixth... that I realized I probably should have kept my mouth shut. At least then I'd have all my teeth."

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The Top

Today, after taking my girlfriend on a date, she invited me back to her place for "hot coffee and dessert." Excitedly, I said yes. When we got there, we actually had coffee and dessert. When I told her this wasn't what I'd had in mind, she kicked me out for being a pervert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 154

You deserved it 68 069

Today, I put on some skimpy shorts and bent down to get something on the bottom shelf of the fridge to get my boyfriend's attention. On my way up, I slammed my head on the edge of the fridge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 945

You deserved it 46 026

The Top

Today, I went to the new Walmart to buy a space heater. After dodging cones in the parking lot, and trying to open several doors while employees looked on, I checked the sign, which said "24 hours." I then realized is stated that the grand opening is tomorrow. I'm now sitting in my apartment shivering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 564

You deserved it 26 462

Today, I went to Target to buy some soap and this 65-70 year old woman next to me was asking a sales associate if they had any bubble bath mix. I suddenly pictured her naked, bathing herself and suddenly my dick just couldn't sit still. It's probably because I haven't had sex in over 22 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 620

You deserved it 13 411

Today, I told my boyfriend he's handsome, which I do often. Not everyday, but maybe once or twice a week. He got upset at me. He said it makes him feel uncomfortable. We've been together for 3 years and I still think he's the most handsome man I've ever seen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 114

You deserved it 156

Today, in the middle of sex, my husband accidentally headbutted me, almost knocking me unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 830

You deserved it 4 378

Today, I got a 31% on a Chinese test at school. I moved here to New Jersey from China two months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 485

You deserved it 19 305

Today, it was so cold that I had to put slippers over my slippers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 621

You deserved it 6 077