By Baby eater - 20/05/2014 00:00 - United States - Clarksville

Today, I told my 4-year-old neighbor that I'm pregnant. His response was to attack me with a stick "for swallowing a baby." Three people had to pull him off. FML
I agree, your life sucks 51 498
You deserved it 5 830
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Top comments

omgitsmoe 26

Why did you eat that baby ?

399 17
froggyjade 16

3 people? That's one strong 4 year old

339 1

Comments

wingedelephants 17

It is shockingly nice that a child so young actually cares about the baby, but otherwise that completely sucks.

8 26
TimysterGates 15

He's quite young to have such strong feelings against cannibalism. Maybe his mom ate a baby once claiming to be pregnant. Could be a serious PTSS for your little neighbour!

13 31
classiceagle63 16

That must have been a sticky situation since he took it like a baby.

5 8
cakefete2 30

Might as well have painted a bullseye with a caption saying "angry thumbs attack here".

6 1
underthesea12 24

if you would have eaten him you could have had a 4yo

9 2
cakefete2 30

Good way to bypass the "terrible twos".

9 0
phoneaddict13 29

hope you and the baby are ok and congratulations!

8 1
chromegirl666 7

I'm betting his parents were inventing answers to the where do babies come from question, but at least it backfired in a hilarious way ;)

10 6
mollyjynxjax 28

Because a pregnant woman being attacked with a stick is absolutely hilarious...

3 0
beanthemouse 13

Ok, this is really funny omg this FML made my day. I just hope the mother apologized and explains to her son the truth and that you really did not swallow a baby. I hope you are OK, FYI.

6 4
notesz 21

I feel like this sould need a backup story, no kid would do this without a reason.

1 5
mollyjynxjax 28

You obviously haven't spent much time around kids. They're irrational at the best of times.

1 0
mkcherry 14

This is why I'm a firm believer in never lying to children. Once they're old enough to ask where babies come from they can probably grasp a very simplified non graphic explanation (a man and a woman do something physical and then a baby grows inside the woman (like a seed growing in the ground)) end of story or something along those lines. A lot of children can not even verbalize things like abuse and assault because we tell them about storks, wee-wees and privates and nonsense instead of using real words.

15 6
StzaCrack666 18

it really ***** them up later in life. I cant count the number of sheltered people ive met that thought Hooters was a strip club rather than a restaurant

3 2
doodlecloud 26

Agree 100%. These issues are really not a big deal to children, they only seem a big deal because we mix our adult views and fears up in it all...bottom line, if a kid is old enough to ask a question, they're old enough to get a proper answer. Just adjust the level of detail to the age of the child/detail of the question being asked

3 1