Work: Today, I sat down on a chair after my very large boss sat on...

By Anonymous - 18/05/2012 11:49 - United States

Today, I sat down on a chair after my very large boss sat on it all day. When I got up, my pants were damp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 050

You deserved it 2 750

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Same thing different taste

Fast and Furious

By TooQuick - 27/04/2016 12:19 - Mozambique - Maputo

Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 011

You deserved it 2 788

By helpme - 04/12/2013 04:05 - United States - Brockton

Today, I got a new chair at work. After spending 3 hours putting it together, I was called into my boss's office and let go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 565

You deserved it 5 723

By shart - 09/03/2016 02:48 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I had an accident at work. Not the kind involving worker's compensation. The kind involving desperately scrubbing my office chair with paper towels, before going home to change my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 545

You deserved it 2 274

By Anonymous - 25/01/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, while at the urinal doing my business, my trousers fell all the way to the ground. As I bent down to pull them back up, my boss walked in the bathroom and thought I was mooning him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 953

You deserved it 3 807

By badbowel - 31/01/2018 13:00 - United States - Utica

Today, I was sick from both ends at work. My boss wouldn't let me go home, and told me to borrow a pair of spare pants to change into. I suffered another bout of gastroenteritis and shit someone else's pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 853

You deserved it 296

By kbartlett86 - 24/06/2010 20:02 - Canada

Today, after sitting for hours at my desk, my legs fell asleep. When I got up to go to the bathroom on my break, I couldn't walk properly and leaned against things so I wouldn't fall over. My supervisor then came over and started lecturing me about being drunk at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 527

You deserved it 4 615

By Username - 21/03/2012 17:10 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, my boss recognized my shoes under the stall wall and had a conversation with me while we were both taking a dump. I had severe diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 402

You deserved it 2 343

By Anonymous - 16/10/2015 13:31 - United States

Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 322

You deserved it 1 817

By goldenshower - 05/02/2010 18:22 - United States

Today, I woke up at a guy's house drunk and soaked in my own pee. I had passed out with all my clothes on. Since I was late for work and didn't have a change of clothes, all I could do was throw my jeans in the dryer. I had to sit all day at work in crusty pee pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 494

You deserved it 56 484

By Umlungu23 - 18/02/2019 00:00

Today, during my lunch break, I sat on the manager's chair. As I sat down, I heard a snapping sound and I ended up on the floor. Everyone now calls me "the lumpy girl" who broke the manager's chair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 043

You deserved it 436

KeannaLove 32

Friday 18 May 2012 16:28

He was just marking his territory.

hapetreefriend 1

Friday 18 May 2012 16:28

Ewwwww

Comments

debbster7 18

Friday 18 May 2012 17:06

Awe come on! You know you like his ball sweat ;)

jbe_fml 0

Friday 18 May 2012 17:14

Cool that room Down

Needafarm 22

Friday 18 May 2012 17:16

Did you look before you sat on the chair? On a second note, YUCK!

ShuckFit 4

Friday 18 May 2012 17:26

damn that's nasty, and you know it probably smelled too. I guess that's what you get for sitting down on the job. you're lucky you're not fired.

tgav11 0

Friday 18 May 2012 17:33

Thats Americans for you

raraisbang 12

Friday 18 May 2012 17:39

Because canadians never have brief moments of stupidity and shitty luck, right? ;)

SouthernPride95 19

Friday 18 May 2012 19:00

48 this is why your a dumbass

lidemocr 0

Friday 18 May 2012 17:36

Why are we assuming said boss is a man?

ICastillo 24

Friday 18 May 2012 17:40

Damn that's gross you just marinated in your bosses juices.

KaelaKhaotic 5

Friday 18 May 2012 17:45

Sweat mixed with a bladder problem?

stud68Camaro 0

Saturday 19 May 2012 7:19

What's up

japtch 15

Friday 18 May 2012 18:11

Swass.

pilar21 7

Friday 18 May 2012 18:17

I guess he worked his butt off!

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The Top

Today, I got stuck in an elevator. The help-line told me, "Don't touch the door. We'll be there soon". Two hours later, I had a headache, my legs were stiff, and my date must've thought I stood her up. The tech finally arrived, pries the door open, then rudely asked, "Why didn't you do that yourself?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 451

You deserved it 3 567

Today, and every time I try to talk to my mother about being a lesbian, she just says in the most condescending way, "Oh no you're not sweetie, it’s just a phase." The "phase" has lasted 17 years, including marrying my wife and adopting twin sons, but sure, it’s “just a phase.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 733

You deserved it 229

The Top

Today, I realized that customers at my work ask me, "Are you new or just stupid?" just as often as they did when I first started. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 260

You deserved it 8 130

Today, I had to explain to my teenage daughter that no, the dishwasher didn't make the glasses shrink, I'd bought smaller glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 807

You deserved it 6 203

Today, I finally got a phone call from a publisher saying they would publish the book I'd written. I'd gotten loads of rejection letters, so I was so excited. Until I realized it was my dad, feeling sorry for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 423

You deserved it 3 720

Today, we got our Christmas bonuses. Instead of money, the company decided to give us all lunch boxes with the company name on them. I went ahead and put my lunch in mine, then put it in the break-room refrigerator. Apparently so did all the other employees. Now I can't find mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 110

You deserved it 9 275

Today, I walked into work, and the first question my boss asks me is "Are those your pajamas?" I was wearing my favorite outfit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 893

You deserved it 9 488

Today, I was taking a final test online that would account for 65% of my final grade, for which I'd worked extremely hard. I had one submission for the test, and my roommate thought it would be funny to click the "Submit All" Button while I was getting a glass of water. I got a 13%. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 216

You deserved it 3 487

Same thing different taste

Fast and Furious

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