Intimacy: Today, I realized I'm pussy whipped by a chick I'm not even...

By mad dude - 12/01/2011 07:46

Today, I realized I'm pussy whipped by a chick I'm not even dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 855

You deserved it 41 549

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Same thing different taste

Tangled web

By Anonymous - 27/10/2023 10:00

Today, I realized that I might be falling for a girl. She's fucking beautiful. She can't love me, I'm not good enough for her, and she's in love with someone else. Besides, I have a girlfriend but it never seems like we're close and I don't even know if I had a crush on her before, but I still love her as a friend and can't break her heart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90

You deserved it 651

By Jack - 10/01/2016 02:07 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, after dating my girlfriend for a while, I had a realization. She often says things like, "You're my favorite!" and scratches my beard, which I appreciated affectionately. Upon meeting her pets, it dawned on me that I am just another one of her cats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 640

You deserved it 2 507

By sadman - 05/02/2011 07:16 - United States

Today, I had a date with a girl I'd been seeing for about a month. When I got home, I saw her facebook status changed to "In a relationship". This made me kind of excited, until I realized it wasn't with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 023

You deserved it 3 792

By Anonymous - 29/01/2012 19:55 - United States

Today, I realized the closest thing I've had to an intimate relationship with a female is the one I have with my cat. Even then, she ignores me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 516

You deserved it 5 792

By ohmylordy - 29/10/2010 05:48 - United States

Today, while talking with my girlfriend about dating, I learned that she has had more girlfriends than I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 342

You deserved it 6 656

By Patrick - 27/01/2010 11:55 - United States

Today, I realized that my ex-girlfriend has gone further with a girl than I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 515

You deserved it 5 282

Good boy, best boy

By Anonymous - 20/07/2020 14:01

Today, I realised that I have a better relationship with my cat than I do with my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 201

You deserved it 404

Timing is everything

By Anonymous - 27/01/2012 22:54 - France

Today, my girlfriend woefully admitted that she thinks of me more as a brother than as a boyfriend, all while I was still inside her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 965

You deserved it 3 400

By Forever Alone x2 - 07/01/2012 19:47 - United States

Today, I found out that the only two people I've had feelings for in years are both dating each other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 054

You deserved it 4 082

By Anonymous - 04/01/2016 15:14 - United States - Dalton

Today, this beautiful girl that I've known for a long time told me that she just can't date me anymore because I remind her too much of her cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 416

You deserved it 1 903

chasin_butterfli 0

Wednesday 12 January 2011 12:21

You understand that you have to actually be getting it before you can be whipped by it, right?

Cinn_fml 22

Wednesday 12 January 2011 12:42

Just learn that the word 'no' exists, because sometimes, it just needs to be used.

Comments

izzyboos 0

Tuesday 12 July 2011 23:12

whats pussy whipped?

Mcpots 0

Friday 29 July 2011 5:11

Thats called bitch whipped

MrIncredibleSME 3

Monday 1 August 2011 22:07

Cuff 'em

hiddenpoet 0

Monday 5 September 2011 2:24

sameseis

slimmathers123 10

Tuesday 11 October 2011 5:31

Colby? Colby Jones?

MisterMuffinz 13

Saturday 29 October 2011 15:29

So am I man... So am I...

hugosheehan 6

Tuesday 1 November 2011 6:31

You're not the only one.. ;/

skullman870 1

Wednesday 16 May 2012 5:23

It happens to all of us at one point

rallen719 3

Sunday 19 August 2012 13:54

What does pussy whipped mean?

Akerra89 14

Friday 7 September 2012 5:29

Then stop doin her...

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I overheard my soon to be step-daughter telling her friend on the phone that she hopes that mine and her father's wedding is just a big joke, and that he isn't really going to go through with it. I just dropped five grand on a dress and venue. She's in for a surprise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 054

You deserved it 3 116

Today, while trying to spice up our marriage, we decided to get a hotel room and roleplay as strangers who meet in a bar and have a one night stand. By the time I got there, he was engrossed in the football and on the beer. He didn't notice me arrive and when he did, he was too drunk to get the roleplay right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 442

You deserved it 274

The Top

Today, I was at dinner with my boyfriend and his family. We were talking about relationships, and I commented on how online dating was the dumbest thing ever. His mom and step-dad went on to tell me how they had met through an online dating service. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 866

You deserved it 50 165

Today, I left my son with my husband while I went to the store. Ten minutes later, my dog was missing a large patch of fur, and neither of them can stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 836

You deserved it 7 939

Today, I discovered that nothing kills a wet dream faster than a kitten who pounces on things that wiggle under the blanket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 851

You deserved it 4 218

Today, I found out that my boss of 2 years not only doesn't know my name, but calls me "Jew hair" behind my back because of my natural ringlets. This man determines all of my career progression. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 311

You deserved it 1 884

Today, my morbidly obese mother gave me an angry lecture at dinner, saying without any trace of irony that my vegetarian diet is "unhealthy and utterly unacceptable". FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 585

You deserved it 4 006

Today, I found out that the day I moved out of my parents' house, they invited my whole family over and had a party to celebrate the fact that I was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 228

You deserved it 5 370

Same thing different taste

Tangled web

Good boy, best boy

Timing is everything

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