Miscellaneous: Today, I ordered a pizza. I paid and tipped the pizza guy, and... - FML

By Musicfreak - 18/12/2011 23:36 - United States

Today, I ordered a pizza. I paid and tipped the pizza guy, and instead of saying goodbye, I got tongue-tied and said, "I love you, boo." FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 622

You deserved it 30 773

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By lol112 - 02/06/2012 12:47 - United States - Monroe Township

Today, when I was ordering pizza, I got a text from my mom saying "I love you". When the man thanked me I accidentally said, "I love you too." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 797

You deserved it 5 463

By Cano951 - 16/12/2011 20:16 - United States

Today, I was bitched out by a pizza delivery man. I didn't have the cash to pay him for a pizza I didn't even order. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 383

You deserved it 2 608

Enjoy!

By sad and hungry - 06/06/2015 14:37 - United States - Hackensack

Today, I'm getting over a nasty breakup, and decided to treat myself and order a pizza online. After waiting 45 minutes, I checked the site. Turns out, I'd forgotten to change the address on the site. I sent my ex a free pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 552

You deserved it 6 571

How deep is it?

By Anonymous - 22/12/2019 01:00

Today, my husband rolled over in his sleep, cuddled up to me, and lovingly whispered “I love you Pizza Hut...” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 888

You deserved it 269

Did I teach you NOTHING?

By Anonymous - 19/07/2022 00:00

Today, I ordered pizza for dinner and left cash by the door so my son could pay for it, in case it arrived before I got home. I told him they should get all the money, but I just found the tip. Apparently he thought I'd miscounted. I'm a server. FML

I agree, your life sucks 832

You deserved it 174

By CheeseLover - 02/12/2016 00:44 - United States - Spring

Today, the pizza delivery man and I know more about each other than me and my family ever have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 776

You deserved it 1 148

By Anonymous - 24/03/2014 20:01 - United States - Denver

Today, I was ordering a pizza over the phone. When the guy asked for my order, I yelled "Hey, you guys wanted pepperoni, right?" In reality, I was yelling this to my cat. College hasn't made me many friends so far. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 560

You deserved it 8 962

It's the thought that counts…

By Charlatan126 - 03/02/2021 05:00 - United States - Hilliard

Today, I finally had a man say, "I love you" to me in a sincere tone. It was a customer, who was high, over the phone. I said it back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 838

You deserved it 143

PS I Love You

By Anonymous - 13/02/2021 17:01 - Sweden - G?teborg

Today, I had a group project on Zoom with some classmates I'm not so familiar with. When we were done and said our goodbyes, I said, "Bye bye, I love you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 640

You deserved it 327

By but I tried anal and everything - 22/11/2012 16:13 - United States - Des Moines

Today, in break from tradition, I proposed to my boyfriend. We were at a Japanese Pagoda. Water was trickling everywhere; the moment was perfect. While I was on my knee, after pouring my heart out, he looked wistfully out over the water and said, "So, I was thinking pizza tonight." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 793

You deserved it 6 702

Next

Top comments

SmeXikoE 3

Monday 19 December 2011 1:42

Hey, it's me. I just want to say. I love you too And I will be coming by more often with and without pizzas.

gress269 4

Monday 19 December 2011 1:40

I do that every time.

Comments

imnutsss 0

Monday 19 December 2011 2:58

I get tongue tied like that wayyyy too much, but nothing so intimate as such..

brick_man33 14

Monday 19 December 2011 3:05

I once tipped the pizza guy by getting him stoned.

fanpire411 4

Monday 19 December 2011 3:10

are you Persian? cos Persians always say 'boo' :P

geon_olam 17

Monday 19 December 2011 6:56

in persian, calling someone "my liver" is an endearing term. if you are persian, at least you didnt call him your liver.

jbsshawty 0

Monday 19 December 2011 3:14

Goodbye... I love you boo anyone could see how similar they are.

hiphop_danca94 2

Monday 19 December 2011 3:17

Freudian slip?

gimmeasalad 9

Monday 19 December 2011 3:27

OMG! I did that once. I was volunteering and I just called someone to tell them that they need to register, and I got the answering machine. After leaving a very formal message, I ended with, "lurv u! Bye." Everyone in the office starts cracking up. I think i did it because thats usually how i end conversations with my cousins. Super embarressing...

sissycullen 4

Monday 19 December 2011 3:40

"Sorry, I meant goodbye, not 'I love you, boo'." "It's okay, have a nice night ma'am." "You too mom- DAMN! JUST LEAVE!"

majorasshole 4

Monday 19 December 2011 3:42

Freudian slip?

Gregabob00 0

Monday 19 December 2011 3:57

I had just got off the phone with my mom and told my boss love you bye befor.

Sarkisa54 5

Monday 19 December 2011 4:28

LMFAO how do u get tongue tied while sayin good bye to a random person???

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The Top

Today, I stuffed my buttcrack with toilet paper right before my job interview because I tend to sweat there a lot and I was wearing a white skirt. I went to the bathroom afterward to take it out but it wasn't there anymore. It could have only gone up two places. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 761

You deserved it 15 563

Today, I drove to a job interview. I had to sneeze, but because I was driving on the highway, I didn't let go of the wheel to cover my mouth. I didn't know the sneeze was a "productive" one until I was sitting in the interview, looked down at my new blouse, and saw the giant lugie sitting there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 409

You deserved it 8 930

The Top

Today, I was at the dentist getting a cavity filled. As she's drilling into my tooth, I feel the drill slip, and then she quickly stuffs gauze into my mouth. She nervously laughs and says to me "Wow! You must really be numb!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 170 403

You deserved it 7 512

Today, my ex-best friend, who I haven't spoken to in a year because of how obsessive she got, posted a picture of herself with dyed brown hair and glasses. We look like twins. Even I thought it was me. Some people are commenting that I look beautiful. School starts tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 392

You deserved it 1 457

Today, while working in a jail, I had to tell an inmate arrested for domestic violence that no, he could not use his phone call to call me at home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 054

You deserved it 2 278

Today, while I was working at a call center, a customer was pranking me using an obviously fake Asian accent. He kept saying his name was “Phuck Mi”, his phone number was 666-3629 (as in "Sex sex sex free sex tonight") and making moaning noises and sexual phrases. I don’t get paid enough for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 548

You deserved it 130

Today, I confessed my feelings to the guy I've had the biggest crush on. He spent the next ten minutes calling me delusional, said that I know nothing about him, and laughed that "this isn't Twilight, for fuck's sake". All he did when I started crying was pat me on the head and leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 177

You deserved it 10 145

Today, I got married. My father saw this as a good time to give some solemn, heartfelt advice to my new husband: "That ring gets real heavy fast." I was standing right there. So was my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 855

You deserved it 4 695