By anonymous - 02/09/2012 22:31 - United States - Anaheim

Today, I met a really cute girl at a club. At first, she told me I was cute. Then, she slurred that I look like "a spork on legs." Then she sprayed the inside of my mouth with vomit as she kissed me. FML
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Top comments

flockz 19

did you spoon her when you got back to her place? or was the vomit too much of a turn off?

167 9

Comments

Inapprehensible 11

Life Lesson Learned #1 ( LLL ): Once you hit the club make sure that hot chick/dude you've been eyeing the entire time... make sure they didn't have one too many drinks.

5 7
challan 19

I was pretty wasted the past two nights, but I'm almost 100% positive that I didn't call anyone a spork. However, I'd like to, and say it like Beaker from the muppets. Spork de spork de dork.

18 7
DocBastard 38

Why does it sound like you're bragging about being drunk? And isn't the legal drinking age 21 where you live? And why do I doubt I'll get any satisfying answers?

21 8
cblock94 7

I wonder that too. My roommate in college (17) manages to get drunk and wasted a few nights a week. Makes me wonder.

3 7
mhopper 13

Who would start drinking before 21? That's unheard of!!!

11 2
klovely22 13

Doc- I just read your profile for the first time. Your rules are hilarious!! One question. If everyone followed those rules, would FML even exist?

6 5
mikeymayhem_87 15

Yep... 21 is the age, regardless of whatever state. Silly underage drinkers lol

1 3
challan 19

Not bragging at all! But, I am in college. Part of the experience as long as grades are not harmed.

6 3
DarkMarkInTheSky 9

I don't condone underage drinking, nor do I discriminate against it. Just advise that you know your limit and stay with people you trust. Don't end up in the hospital on the edge of death like me. Poor decisions make for tough life lessons.

0 1
isis_morrigan 18

It seems the ones most likely to brag about getting drunk are the ones who are underage. I think they feel cooler or something by discussing how wasted/trashed/drunk ect they were, not realizing what a turn off it is for real adults.

3 1
challan 19

What turns me off is back fat and bad tattoos.

1 3
malikathamilf 2

So you didn't think to give up on her after calling you a spork? I've stopped talking to people for way less.

3 4
Shayton 12

I'm guessing you got lucky that night? (;

3 5
Junizumi4 3

So not a "didn't see that coming" moment.

0 2
Petepoop 6

That turns me on. Threesome?

6 4
fleurie 6

That's definitely FML-worthy. *cringe*

1 1