Health: Today, I learned the hard way that an ice cube is capable of...

By bloodyLIP - 14/05/2011 19:06 - United States

Today, I learned the hard way that an ice cube is capable of ripping the skin off your bottom lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 268

You deserved it 14 166

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Same thing different taste

By mk - 20/06/2009 05:47 - Canada

Today, I had a big craving for a popsicle so I went to a convenience store and bought one. On my first bite, my upper lip got stuck to it. I ripped it off and spent the next 10 minutes trying to stop the bleeding from the giant cut I'd put in my lip. It hurt too much to finish the popsicle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 409

You deserved it 13 428

By idiot - 24/01/2013 19:53 - Australia - Newcastle

Today, I took a swig of lemonade from my cup, only to feel something hard in my mouth. Thinking it was a roach or something, I freaked out and spat out the drink. I doused my laptop and soaked myself in the process, only to find out it was a small ice-cube. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 563

You deserved it 40 289

By SJDAOisdjlkSADlksda - 02/07/2016 02:37 - United States

Today, I witnessed my sister use some ice cubes on her blistered toes, then quietly return them to the tray in the fridge. I've been putting ice from there into my drinks for weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 849

You deserved it 987

By Anonymous - 04/03/2016 16:47 - United States - Suwanee

Today, I had so much skin peeling off my lips that it got caught in my fork as I was eating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 245

You deserved it 5 501

By Clutz - 25/10/2009 00:41 - United States

Today, after I had finished vacuuming, I ripped the cord out of the outlet and it hit me in the face cutting both my top and bottom lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 418

You deserved it 35 879

By Vicky - 26/12/2009 20:47 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend went to kiss me as we were walking home. It was very icy and he slipped. His teeth went through my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 160

You deserved it 2 927

Bizarre topping

By Grossed out - 10/11/2021 11:00

Today, I was eating an ice cream on a sidewalk and some woman decided it was time to clip her toenails on her balcony above me. One of the nail shards fell onto my ice cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 246

You deserved it 93

By manicmandy - 01/08/2010 20:24 - United States

Today, I learned that ice cubes do not cool down hot oil. Instead, it causes a massive explosion of hot grease to splatter all over my parents' kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 500

You deserved it 78 559

By person - 26/12/2010 17:59 - Jordan

Today, I was applying some Icy Hot to my sore thighs, when I accidentally got a little on my dime sacks. For the next hour, it felt like someone had lit a match under my plums. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 913

You deserved it 28 330

By monkeycannon7 - 24/04/2012 16:36 - United States - Woodbridge

Today, I learned the hard way not to take off your shirt with a toothpick in your mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 344

You deserved it 29 683

joooeee 3

Sunday 15 May 2011 0:16

which lips?!?!

PrincessesCrown 17

Sunday 15 May 2011 0:35

Put some ice on it. Wait! Maybe not.

Comments

Imabigbeast 5

Sunday 15 May 2011 8:30

no shit, sherlock

selumaior 0

Sunday 15 May 2011 8:54

why didn't you just put some warm water on it? YDI man.... when u're stupid, life's hard...

brozorz 0

Sunday 15 May 2011 9:32

i know the pain. happened to my tongue

DeLpHe3zY 7

Sunday 15 May 2011 10:11

Um.. How old are you

Young_Champ14 0

Sunday 15 May 2011 11:06

that's y wen ur getting it off u run water on it smart one!

smiiileyyy 5

Sunday 15 May 2011 11:55

:S ouch!

squishy01 0

Sunday 15 May 2011 14:17

Sucking on a lemon usually helps when that happens to me.

nvrsaynvr 0

Sunday 15 May 2011 15:35

i learned tht wen i wuz about 4... i learned it'll rip yur tounge too wen i wuz about 7.

franceypants 0

Sunday 15 May 2011 16:18

and your tastebuds too!

grahamfriend 0

Sunday 15 May 2011 18:01

that's what you get for living in Jersey!

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The Top

Today, I took a girl on a date. This girl is tiny, about 4 ft 10 and petite. She ordered a 16 inch pizza, garlic bread, wings, fries, and multiple drinks, and damn if she didn’t eat every bite of it, it was impressive. Until we were screwing later and she vomited the whole meal down my chest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 544

You deserved it 167

Today, we had two of our longest serving coworkers retire at the company I work at, and they hired two young prospects to replace them. The problem? They asked me to train them both for the next 4 months, cancelling my PTO in the process, and then I learned they were being paid nearly 20% more than I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 560

You deserved it 78

The Top

Today, I caught one of my students checking out my butt while I was helping another student at his table. I teach 8th grade. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 455

You deserved it 405

Today, my work directory was updated to reflect my recent promotion. Due to lack of space, they abbreviated the title. I'm now listed as "Sr Anal". FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 342

You deserved it 1 670

Today, after not receiving my paycheck for over a month, I confronted my boss about it. His response? "You still work here?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 749

You deserved it 3 882

Today, my boyfriend was trying to tackle me to the bed when we heard a loud pop. The pop turned out to be him breaking my pinky finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 030

You deserved it 1 102

Today, my boyfriend told me that I have the bad habit of not doing the dishes before he has his daily piss in the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 738

You deserved it 5 618

Today, I had finally gotten my dogs to quiet down and my baby to fall asleep. Not thirty seconds later, my neighbor's car alarm went off. They aren't home for the weekend, and the damn alarm has now been blaring for three hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 927

You deserved it 1 921

Same thing different taste

Bizarre topping

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