Animals: Today, I had to get into my house via the dog flap because my... - FML

By Anonymous - 18/02/2011 21:18 - United States

Today, I had to get into my house via the dog flap because my mom changed the locks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 136

You deserved it 4 492

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Good boy

By Anonymous - 26/10/2014 00:51 - United States - Bloomington

Today, my mother locked me out of the house. Why? The dog and her needed some time to talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 068

You deserved it 2 919

By TheComputerGuy96 - 22/05/2010 07:56 - Italy

Today, I was locked out of my house. After hours of trying to break the door, I found out I accidentally left a window open. The door, however, still needs to be replaced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 614

You deserved it 32 603

By wished i had a cat - 19/10/2018 17:30

Today, I discovered that my dog knows how to lock doors. This wouldn't have been a problem if anyone in my house every carried a key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 364

You deserved it 623

By Anonymous - 22/01/2016 19:00 - United States - Royersford

Today, I got locked out of my house. After trying unsuccessfully to jimmy the lock, I managed to climb in through the kitchen window. I soon found out I had an effect on the door after all; it won't open at all any more, even with the right key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 302

You deserved it 5 738

By joser6969 - 29/10/2011 14:07 - United States

Today, I locked myself out of my own shop. And I'm a locksmith. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 949

You deserved it 11 949

By Sky - 25/07/2018 01:30

Today, since my parents always told me that I was welcome to come home whenever I want or need, I decided to stop by. They'd changed the locks and wouldn't let me in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 489

You deserved it 329

By xnickx - 16/04/2009 14:47 - United States

Today, I changed the locks on my apartment so my crazy ex girlfriend couldn't get in. I went to her house to return her house key. I accidentally gave her the key to my new locks, and can't find her old house key. Now I need her to come let me in to my own house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 685

You deserved it 58 910

By ohhhemmgee - 06/09/2012 06:39 - United States - Reno

Today, I locked myself out of the house I was house-sitting. An hour later, and my fifth attempt at climbing the fence, I figured I'd try the door one more time. Turns out I was turning the handle the wrong way and the door wasn't locked in the first place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 761

You deserved it 29 409

Get out

By Leave me alone, bitch!!! - 20/11/2021 02:00

Today, I found out that my mother changed all the locks of the house and threw away all of my girlfriend's stuff. I don't know what the fuck happened there. I actually bought the house two years ago because I had enought of her being nosey and controlling with both of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 618

You deserved it 117

Stuck

By Anonymous - 10/12/2009 11:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I found myself locked out of my house. I had to squeeze myself through a tiny window around the back. While hanging upside down, my hood fell over my head. My dog ran through to investigate the noise and ravaged me thinking I was a burglar. I then fell and broke my wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 347

You deserved it 5 231

Next

Top comments

Valle79 5

Friday 18 February 2011 23:03

Did you consider that just MAYBE she's trying to keep you out?

sduhamel 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 5:10

Wait a min, if u could get to ur House thru th door flap, won't it be vulnerable to breakins?

Comments

EVELYNandDIEGO 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 6:51

Woof woof :-D

magicstar 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 7:11

don't drink out the toilet

princessjasmine2_fml 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 7:45

Why bother changing the locks when any crack head in the neighborhood can break in via doggy door? That happened to my neighbor once.

CelinaJeanine 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 8:51

What if he's living with her? If he's 15 or something? haha

XDBrittany1228 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 16:04

Okay...u go through the dog flap...and your life is ******? Not really.

SpRiTzSpLaSh 7

Saturday 19 February 2011 17:18

Lool OP how did you get through.?

Jammy01jams 2

Saturday 19 February 2011 18:08

Uh yeah you suck, I have had to break into my house twice before. I am 16 and my parents changed the locks once and kicked the door without telling me. I now have three keys one for my pants, work pants and school pant. just so I don't run into that issue again.

TheChosenOne96 1

Saturday 19 February 2011 18:37

omg i'm sorry but that is just too freaking hilarious!

TechFire 25

Saturday 19 February 2011 20:40

Shouldn't this FML have ended in you realizing that you have a serious eating disorder? Get your anorexic ass some help!

khatyangelz 0

Sunday 20 February 2011 4:44

:(

goaliemkl123 8

Saturday 19 February 2011 23:33

that usually means she doesnt want you to come back in

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The Top

Today, my mother, who thinks I'm a virgin, called me while I was having sex with my boyfriend. I have to answer every time she calls or she freaks out. I ended the conversation quickly and hung up. Or so I thought. She listened in to the rest of our 20-minute lovemaking session, and I have some explaining to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 791

You deserved it 1 708

Today, I asked a girl at work out, who'd claimed she was single. Not ten minutes later, our boss fired me. Turns out that girl is actually his side chick he cheats on his wife with, even though she’s 19 and he’s 48. Not illegal, just scummy as hell, and he fired me out of jealousy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 745

You deserved it 100

The Top

Today, I drove to the airport and parked in extended stay. As the plane was going down the runway, I tried to spot my car. I found it very quickly, as the car alarm was going off and all its lights were flashing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 480

You deserved it 454

Today, as I was walking to go look at Christmas lights in my neighborhood, I really had to go number two. I called my dad to come and pick me up. I couldn’t hold it in much longer, so I took a crap in the sewer in the street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 734

You deserved it 336

Today, the couple who had written the offer we had accepted for our house withdrew it because apparently when they came by for the home inspection, my next door neighbor's teenage son tried to sell them heroin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 472

You deserved it 3 428

Today, I witnessed my roommate pop a blister with a skewer and casually place it back in the kitchen drawer, before wiping what seeped out with the teatowel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 901

You deserved it 2 073

Today, out of spite, I wrote "Ms. Piggy" instead of my professor's actual name in the heading of my essay. Guess what I forgot to do before turning it in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 960

You deserved it 5 093

Today, on my second day at my new job, my supervisor told me that I was ready to make a sale on my own. Things were going well, until said supervisor interrupted my sales pitch, apologized on my behalf for being new, and stole my sale. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 437

You deserved it 1 365