Animals: Today, I had to get into my house via the dog flap because my...

By Anonymous - 18/02/2011 21:18 - United States

Today, I had to get into my house via the dog flap because my mom changed the locks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 136

You deserved it 4 492

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Good boy

By Anonymous - 26/10/2014 00:51 - United States - Bloomington

Today, my mother locked me out of the house. Why? The dog and her needed some time to talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 068

You deserved it 2 919

By TheComputerGuy96 - 22/05/2010 07:56 - Italy

Today, I was locked out of my house. After hours of trying to break the door, I found out I accidentally left a window open. The door, however, still needs to be replaced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 614

You deserved it 32 603

By wished i had a cat - 19/10/2018 17:30

Today, I discovered that my dog knows how to lock doors. This wouldn't have been a problem if anyone in my house every carried a key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 364

You deserved it 623

By Anonymous - 22/01/2016 19:00 - United States - Royersford

Today, I got locked out of my house. After trying unsuccessfully to jimmy the lock, I managed to climb in through the kitchen window. I soon found out I had an effect on the door after all; it won't open at all any more, even with the right key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 302

You deserved it 5 738

By joser6969 - 29/10/2011 14:07 - United States

Today, I locked myself out of my own shop. And I'm a locksmith. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 949

You deserved it 11 949

By Sky - 25/07/2018 01:30

Today, since my parents always told me that I was welcome to come home whenever I want or need, I decided to stop by. They'd changed the locks and wouldn't let me in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 489

You deserved it 329

By xnickx - 16/04/2009 14:47 - United States

Today, I changed the locks on my apartment so my crazy ex girlfriend couldn't get in. I went to her house to return her house key. I accidentally gave her the key to my new locks, and can't find her old house key. Now I need her to come let me in to my own house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 685

You deserved it 58 910

By ohhhemmgee - 06/09/2012 06:39 - United States - Reno

Today, I locked myself out of the house I was house-sitting. An hour later, and my fifth attempt at climbing the fence, I figured I'd try the door one more time. Turns out I was turning the handle the wrong way and the door wasn't locked in the first place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 761

You deserved it 29 409

Get out

By Leave me alone, bitch!!! - 20/11/2021 02:00

Today, I found out that my mother changed all the locks of the house and threw away all of my girlfriend's stuff. I don't know what the fuck happened there. I actually bought the house two years ago because I had enought of her being nosey and controlling with both of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 618

You deserved it 117

Stuck

By Anonymous - 10/12/2009 11:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I found myself locked out of my house. I had to squeeze myself through a tiny window around the back. While hanging upside down, my hood fell over my head. My dog ran through to investigate the noise and ravaged me thinking I was a burglar. I then fell and broke my wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 347

You deserved it 5 231

Valle79 5

Friday 18 February 2011 23:03

Did you consider that just MAYBE she's trying to keep you out?

sduhamel 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 5:10

Wait a min, if u could get to ur House thru th door flap, won't it be vulnerable to breakins?

Comments

ILoveEggnog 7

Saturday 19 February 2011 0:26

Mmmm. **********.

likesocoollike_fml 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 0:30

don't you get what she's trying to say?

ILoveEggnog 7

Saturday 19 February 2011 0:38

I have very long arms, so I can usually reach through the flap and unlock the door.

ShadyFTW1 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 5:51

that sounded dirty.

ILoveEggnog 7

Saturday 19 February 2011 6:53

It does, but I can't figure out why.

jskains 6

Saturday 19 February 2011 1:00

"Is it you are house?" Interesting wording :D

Kiyoha 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 1:34

Video or it didn't happen.

thecovert 7

Saturday 19 February 2011 1:48

I believe that's called "breaking and entering." Would also be "dense syndrome" since you didn't get the hint.

MrFlintstone 5

Saturday 19 February 2011 2:09

that's awesome I do that even if I had the key

SoCalGal14 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 2:14

haha. that's so sad. if that happened to me, i wouldn't even try to get in. i'd just leave.

rachii 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 2:58

Obviously she had something in her brain wanting you to be a dog. haha

blitz426 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 3:26

take the hint

Keywords

Health Poopoo peepee Jewelry Awkward Family Kids Fight Love Relatable Students Work Animals Birds Sleep Noise Mental health Contraception Medication Racism Cheating Pregnancy Relationship advice Friends Teenagers Embarrassing Intimacy Sex Revenge Food Cats

The Top

Today, I've had a crush on a guy for a while - a friend of mine knows this. I finally decided to find out once and for all if there was any chance with him, so I drove to his house, armed with a home cooked meal and wine, only to find the very friend I confided in was at his house. It turns out they are now an item. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 162

You deserved it 151

Today, my dad, who never supported us growing up, and who calls once a month to collect his monthly living expenses, gave me an ultimatum: either buy him a plane ticket so that he can come live with me forever (he's a raging alcoholic) OR to send him $4,500 US Dollars (which where he lives is someone's 6 month salary). FML

I agree, your life sucks 528

You deserved it 105

The Top

Today, the officers of my archery club forgot to check if anybody was behind the targets looking for arrows. I got hit in the leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 644

You deserved it 2 008

Today, I’ve been depressed and lonely for almost half my life now, and no longer have any friends or family. I realised I often started hallucinating, most of it making me able to see my childhood and me playing when we were kids. This is getting too painful to bear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 883

You deserved it 126

Today, it's been a week since I realized how much work the tongue actually does during eating. It pushes food around the mouth to my teeth like a little slug. I've been so conscious of it, I haven't enjoyed eating since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 332

You deserved it 782

Today, I had to run for the train, but because of my bad foot and limping they held the train, much to people's displeasure. No one let me sit down, so for the 20 minute journey, I stood. With a bad foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 914

You deserved it 4 051

Today, I told a girl that she had very pretty eyes. I then had to rinse pepper spray from my own. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 924

You deserved it 2 879

Today, I was driving past a farm that always has 4 chickens walking around outside. It always cheers me up to see them, but I couldn't find them. I wasn't watching the road so I didn't see when I ran over all 4 chickens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 766

You deserved it 54 716

Same thing different taste

Good boy

Get out

Stuck

Top comments

Comments