By courtnayy - 30/09/2013 14:47 - United States

Today, I got proposed to. I have been dating my boyfriend for 3 years and we have 2 kids. It was perfect, except it was my ex-boyfriend who proposed to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 50 650
You deserved it 5 995

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Take the ring and use it to propose to your boyfriend.

Sounds like a dramatic love story. But the guy's pretty late!

Comments

TheDrifter 23

Has he been staring in op's window so much he's thinking that her family is his? Slightly creepy thought. Maybe more than slightly.

150493x 29

Just be patient, OP. I hope your boyfriend does propose at the right time but not just due to the fact your ex has.

It's kind of weird to call him your "boyfriend" after you had two children together...does he not believe in marriage?

TheDrifter 23

I still prefer this overly long use of boyfriend to the words "baby daddy".

DrownedMyFish 18

Not everybody wants to get married. I know a couple that has been together for over 50 years without getting married.

#25 My aunt and uncle have been together for 20odd years, they have a son and have no intention of ever getting married because they BOTH like the way their life is. But OP does want to get married. Different circumstances.

My boyfriend and I have a daughter together and are in no rush to get married. When the time is right, it will happen. People should do it on their own terms, when they are ready.

150493x 29

Just because you have children doesn't mean you need to get married.

It's not a matter of rather or not they need to get married. It's the fact that she seems to want to get married. At least that's the vibe I'm getting. If after two kids the father doesn't want to get married and she does then that's a problem and it needs to be resolved.

OP never said they WANTED to get married. People can appreciate a "perfect" proposal without wanting it. Love is an art like any other.

Awh! I'm sorry, OP. He''ll come around. Best of luck to you

Why are you still talking to your ex or why isn't your babies daddy not serious???

monnanon 13

a relationship with kids is serious. take you archaic views and shove them up your ass please.

You just used a double negative. You can't use isn't and not in the same sentence... Duh!

I seen enough Maury to wonder whose the real baby daddy...

OP this is the perfect time to write a romantic novel or something about your life because I can see a lot of drama in your life's future. And hey if twilight can make money I think you can too.

Is it just me that finds it weird that more and more people are popping out kids without being/getting married? I mean if you have had two already, don't you think you should tie the knot? Don't get me wrong, I'm not one of those religious nuts that are going to condemn you to hell for having children out of wedlock, it just doesn't make sense to me.

Why would anyone have to go to church, buy rings, have a party and wear fancy dresses just because they have kids or have been together for a long time? My parent aren't married, and the only one who has ever commented that it is wrong was the priest of the village.

graceinsheepwear 33

37, every item you mentioned related to a wedding ceremony, not marriage. Marriage does not need to have a church, ring, party, or fancy clothing. It is about commitment, which indeed, your parents seem to have. Still, my bf and I lived together 5 years before marrying, and we thought oh, nothing will change, but it DID change. It felt deeper and stronger and more profound having taken that step.

That's because it seems easier to just have sex (and end up with an unplanned pregnancy) than it is to plan an actual wedding/marriage. There are still a lot of people that feel that a marriage is "just a piece of paper". If both persons are okay with not wanting to get married, that's their relationship and no one else's business. Unfortunately that's not always the case. One may want to get married and having to settle. And 37 just because the priest commented on it doesn't mean there aren't other (non-religious) folks that believe your parents should have gotten married. They can think whatever they want but don't only bash the priest; he's not the only one. :P

The major problem with an unmarried lifetime commitment is that you don't (in many countries) get access to spousal priveleges like health care, death benefits, etc. I see it as less of a religious/moral issue and more of a practical/looking forward issue. If one of them is the primary breadwinner and gets hurt/dies/decides to walk away from the relationship, the other is in a bad way. Legally binding documents like a marriage certificate can help with that.

I agree with #28. There are a lot of legal and financial safeguards that come with being married which single people do not have access to, and these are especially important when you are responsible for the well-being of a child (or children in this case). One can argue whether that ought to change but for the foreseeable future such a drastic change is unlikely. It doesn't have to be a big expensive ceremony; it can be just them at the courthouse with the judge and a couple close friends or family as witnesses. But that "piece of paper" really does provide a lot of stability and protection for the couple and any children in the case that things go wrong, be that death, illness, the loss of a job, or the end of the relationship. Edit: I see that zebediabolical already made this exact point. Great minds think alike, I guess.

mansen 15

Getting married costs money. And sometimes there other things in life that have a higher priority than getting married in the spending money scheme. I have been with my partner for over 7 years, we have 2 children. We are considered common law and the government where I live considers me equal to a wife where all rights are concerned. We do want to get married someday, but, mortgage, vehicle payments, my tuition, putting money aside every month for each childs college savings, bills, etc, come higher than spending money on an engagement ring and then on a wedding. All that will come when it does, when we can better afford that as an extraneous thing. We know we will be together a very very long time. Otherwise we would not have had childdren together, bought a house etc. Again, sometimes people put off marriage due to the money is just needed elsewhere.

monnanon 13

do you live in Scotland @97 becuase i know we have the common law marriage thing here. all countries should have it. i dpnt see why a couple that married after knowing each other a week are viewed as more important and serious than those that have been together for years. lets face it a lot of marriages only last so long because it costs a bunch to leave. how many long married couples do we know that seethe in resentment at each other but wont leave.

WhisperSoflty 20

97, that's such a cop-out. It cost my husband and I like $35 to get married. Our wedding ceremony is costing at least $10,000 so far, much to my dismay (I hate spending money, but having a wedding in a big city means spending lots of it, sadly). People seem to be incapable of separating the two. It is NOT expensive to get legally married. I'm sorry if this comes across snippy, but one of my pet peeves is when people whine about how "expensive" it is to get married, and use it as an excuse to not do so, when what they really mean it how stupid expensive it is to put on a wedding.

monnanon 13

family pressure means a lot of people cannot take the cheaper option. the other reason people complain about the cost of weddings is because saying you dont see a need to be married or you dont wqnt to get married is veiwed with disdain, ridicule or my personal favourite of "you'll change your mind when you meet the right person"

Well that's a no...I just hope your actual boyfriend is just a bit short for the ring from him...

Where was your boyfriend during this perfect proposal? What did he say?