Miscellaneous: Today, I got mugged by a midget. FML

By insomnitude - 05/03/2011 06:55 - United States

Today, I got mugged by a midget. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 768

You deserved it 13 803

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Alexa, play "Ironic" by Alanis Morrissette

By irony, huh? - 20/10/2019 14:00

Today, I got mugged. For an actual mug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 381

You deserved it 105

Mystery

By mugged - 01/06/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I got mugged by someone wearing a bear suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 253

You deserved it 4 710

By Anonymous - 12/01/2011 04:04 - United States

Today, while going to work, I was mugged. On the way back, I was mugged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 596

You deserved it 3 717

By Username - 10/07/2012 15:27 - United States

Today, I got mugged in broad daylight, in a park, by a teenage girl. To top it off, I'm a grown man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 187

You deserved it 9 379

By evil Santa - 25/12/2014 03:48 - United States - Solon

Today, I was mugged by a guy in a Santa suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 141

You deserved it 3 206

By Tanner - 16/07/2011 06:23 - United States

Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 439

You deserved it 3 681

By macguy - 20/10/2016 14:25 - Philippines - Quezon City

Today, I got mugged. For my Big Mac. What the fuck? FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 187

You deserved it 1 009

By Anonymous - 06/04/2016 14:31 - United States - Iowa Park

Today, I got mugged by a fake hooker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 728

You deserved it 8 299

By Chance115 - 11/09/2018 23:30

Today, my knee was dislocated. At a haunted house. By a midget. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 646

You deserved it 299

Unattack dog

By woofwoof - 30/12/2014 04:17 - Turkey - Izmir

Today, I got mugged while walking my dog. He seemed to be OK with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 029

You deserved it 2 995

krushr 3

Saturday 5 March 2011 16:18

So would you say you're short on cash now?

perdix 29

Saturday 5 March 2011 16:22

Did he point the gun at you and say, "Stick 'em down?"

Comments

99136 0

Monday 8 August 2011 5:44

One of the funniest FML's i've ever read. Bravo old chap

hitail23 1

Tuesday 9 August 2011 0:39

it was me

jloverr 0

Friday 12 August 2011 8:33

are you high?

Joser11 0

Friday 23 September 2011 22:40

Must have been a short mugging.

FYLgurl 6

Friday 27 April 2012 6:16

Midgets have feelings too you know

marissastearns 3

Friday 15 June 2012 21:54

Don't under estimate little people!!

merrielp 13

Thursday 2 August 2012 23:29

Tell my wife I want her home. Lol.

Sir_Swaggington 6

Wednesday 30 January 2013 23:00

It seems like OP could've just started running because midgets have stumpy legs and can't keep up with average sized people. Maybe it was a midget with a gun *shrugs*

Harle 24

Monday 1 April 2013 7:52

FUNNIEST DAMN FML

Brad31_fml 21

Saturday 18 May 2013 13:04

Well, this was a short one.

Keywords

Public freakouts Health Relatable Geek Music Scams Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Bikes Transportation Cops Kids Fight Family AITA Mother in law Miscellaneous Relationship advice Social Media Love Work Art Students Noise Birds Animals Sleep Mental health Medication

The Top

Today, I began noticing a certain female name popping up on my husband’s social media notifications,so I asked him about it. He got irrationally upset at the fact that I pronounced her name wrong, told me she’s “nobody”, then said, “I hate it when you accuse me of shit!” I didn’t even accuse him of anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 575

You deserved it 76

Today, while on vacation, I realized my parents and grandparents had been running off and doing quite a few errands lately. After doing some sleuthing, I discovered they were taking turns having blood-curdling sex in our other hotel room down the hall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 684

You deserved it 11 188

The Top

Today, it was really windy and rainy causing me to trip and knock into a little kid. While still gathering myself, I apologized and patted the kid on its head. Then I see people around me starting to laugh. I turn and look at the kid, and discover I've been interacting with a trash can. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 762

You deserved it 52 216

Today, my girlfriend cheated on me, and for the second time in two days. She has now cheated a total of 7 times in the space of 6 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 245

You deserved it 952

Today, I learned that my 13 year-old daughter has been wearing the same pad for a week “because there’s no blood on it.” When I told her that it's still disgusting, she tried to defend herself be saying that, "no one ever told her how long she could wear it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 356

You deserved it 2 817

Today, a girl called me, asking for one of her friends. She wouldn't believe me when I told her she had the wrong number, and I spent a few minutes convincing her she did. After a while she said, "What the fuck?" and hung up. That was the longest conversation I had with a girl in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 452

You deserved it 9 047

Today, knowing that the girl I broke up with last night goes crazy after breakups, I threw away my hair products, thinking she switched them with Nair. She didn't... but she did use the key I keep under a flowerpot to take all of my clothes and burn them on my lawn while I was at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 630

You deserved it 9 002

Today, my Asian girlfriend broke up with me because I'm not Asian, I'm Irish-American, 100%. She doesn't have a problem with me, though. It's her kids. Her grown children want her dating Asian men. She's 62, I'm 63. Is that like reverse racism when the kids are more racist than the parents? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 178

You deserved it 106

Same thing different taste

Alexa, play "Ironic" by Alanis Morrissette

Mystery

Unattack dog

Top comments

Comments