By kittkatt1 - 11/11/2013 01:52 - United States - Dearborn

Today, I found out that when you flush an animal clear of blood for research, there is a nerve inside the heart, which when you strike it right, electrical signals cause the animal to writhe as if alive. Now, my boss knows about my fear of zombies, and I'm now terrified of half my job. FML
I agree, your life sucks 42 373
You deserved it 5 499

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Plot twist: It wasn't the nerve that made it twitch.

Sounds like a pretty unpleasant job to begin with. I hope that it's for a good cause; animal research always makes me really sad.

Comments

Plot twist: It wasn't the nerve that made it twitch.

Plot twist, "World War Z" now stands for "World War Zoo"

\ 28

Spoiler: The Black Marker has been discovered.

\ 28

Oops, it appears not many here are familiar with Dead Space. I apologize for the obscure reference :(

Still a better twist than anything M. Night Shamalan has came up with for the passed 10 years

I got your reference #23. The original dead space scared me so much, I made my bf finish the game for me while I cried in terror under the covers whilst he played it. I became a pussy to that game until DS2 came out and it was no longer that scary. In respect to this FML, i'm surprised peashooters were not mentioned. Mmm. Brains.

I think I'm the only one here who thinks FEAR was the best horror shooter.

JMichael 25

34- I agree with you. FEAR was pretty good.

plants vs zombies reference..i like it #32

I haven't played FEAR, but I know damn well that it's got some jump scares, like in Dead Space.

You don't know fear till you have played Amnesia.

Very true 76 very true amnesia is known to make grown men cry

kittykat1501 31

Cringe alert! Code neon red!

Sounds like a pretty unpleasant job to begin with. I hope that it's for a good cause; animal research always makes me really sad.

You'd be surprised how useless it is and how much data they just throw away. Never mind the consequences when a drug works on animals and they only test it in the short-term on humans. Barbaric, pointless and unjustified practice. Of course, can't generalize, as with anything else, but mostly it's bizzare.

\ 28

Okay, Mr. PETA. You've made your point...

Pointless and unjustified? Have you any idea of the medical accomplishments we have made solely because of animal testing and research on animals? I feel like you are subscribing to the idea of animal research being awful in every regard without doing your research and because it's the hip thing to do.

PETA is definitely the WRONG comparison to make there. Poster was arguing against such practices. Despite their acronym standing for "People for Ethical Treatment of Animals" the PETA is NOT an organization that treats animals ethically or morally. They euthanize more than 95% of their seized and surrendered animals within 24 hours without ever listing them for adoption. Check out the Huffington Post's report on them.

28 - 18 is correct. Most research using animals is thrown out. Animals and humans are too different for any of it to be useful for us. Most of it is just senseless torture and killing.

#28 - I have done enough research to be confident in arguing my point without even beginning to address the ethical side of the issue. As far as safety goes, for a warm-up, look up Thalidomide (from back in the 50's), Flenac, Propulsid. Regarding accuracy, think of what makes an experiment a true experiment: singularity and replication. Singularity is the presence of only one variable in a test. How can this requirement be fulfilled when the test subject is under a tremendous amount of stress or is so ill or pained that he/she dies during or soon after the experiment? At the least, endocrinological and neurological outcomes will be inaccurate. And how can an experiment be replicated with confounding variables so unique and significant? And data is thrown away in unspeakable amounts, often because of the above-mentioned impediments. There are many sources -- non-social activist or "hip" ones -- in which you can find all the aforementioned arguments. A good example is BMJ (formerly British Medical Journal), which published an article in 2011 discussing whether animal testing is "as accurate as flipping a coin". Though I guess it is pretty hip among doctors and clinical researchers, dang. #24 - #29 is quite right. I'm unsure on the statistics, but PETA is indeed a lying, money-craving organization...

No animal research is pointless. All research is gone into with a purpose and is vital to curing diseases that affect both animals and humans. Animal research doesn't just help humans it help animals too.

Humans ARE animals and us and them are endlessly similar. You can do great research with animals and even though its a little sad to think about you have to remember the information learned is good for everyone.

#45 I really don't want to bring emotions into this, but you mentioned being "a little sad". Please Google images of vivisection.

It sounds so cool! Man as long as the research was legitimate, and the animal didn't suffer I think it would be so awesome to see it be reanimated by touching a nerve! Then again maybe I'm just sick and twisted

skyeyez9 24

Do you have any better alternatives? If people dont test on animals, no medicine can be tested and if you hate it so much, DONT swallow another pill, take another vaccine or any other medicine if you are ill. It was tested on animals before it hits the store and pharmacy shelves. If you get severely ill, forgo the morphine, chemo or whatever it is you need. If you are so against it. Can you look your kids in the eye and tell them sorry, but that medicine you need to live was tested on rats, so you cant get any.

Unless your willing to be the next test subject that replaces animal (which means being purposely given a desease than getting experimental treatment and the killed and dissected to see the effects) or you have an accual viable alternative the perhaps you should quit bitching or quit taking any form of pharmicutals

Yes, there are alternatives. In vitro tests, computer models, medical imaging, clinical research, epidemiology, to name some. The similarity between animals and humans is anatomical and physiological -- yes, structurally we are fairly similar, -- but research in our day and age is so intricate that conducting it on a cellular level in species with critical metabolic and pharmacological differences is dangerous. Furthermore, medicine doesn't go on the shelf immediately after it is tested on animals -- it then undergoes clinical trials on humans, which, statistically, fail miserably. Someone who doesn't support animal testing is not someone who automatically supports testing on people -- it's gruesome to even imply that. And if you're going touch the whole don't-take-"pharmicutals" deal, then consider that the only reason all medication is tested on animals is because doing so is required by law.

juarezj96 12

He's gonna use that to have fun with you. Who wouldn't!

Maybe the other non-terrifying half of your job will make up for it?

Just remember it's not a real zombie if it doesn't move on its own

You can also artificially pump the heart shortly after death, and it will start pumping briefly on its own. Even it has been cut out of its body

lou_knee 6

Yep. I once spent a year studying angina medications for which we had to keep rat hearts pumping once removed from the rat's body. They kept beating for a good 15-30 min or so.

Just a heads up... Ducks are the worst... They twitch like they just fell out MJ's thriller video...

That would have freaked me out!! I probably would have ended up smashing the animal or something lol, double tap!!

This reminds me of this one time when I was going around stabbing people and all of the sudden one of my victims rose up and started twerking in front of me and then fell to the ground dead, now I'm too scared to be a mass murderer