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Answer to your problem: just have sex more often to keep him excited. Problem solved
This is why you should never date or especially marry someone you're not physically attracted to. Call me shallow if you want but you ladies could have sex with anything just by laying on your back but us guys - physiologically speaking we kinda have to want it, and if we don't want it we can't fake it. No matter how good the other parts of the relationship are, it is doomed.
tbh I don't understand how he is piece of shit for not wanting to have sex. I do it everyday, because sometimes its more relaxing and better to just please yourself then go to effort of trying to get someone else in the mood only for them to do a shitty job. YDI for not being the better option OP.
Keywords
He must have one strong hand shake
So I'm not too sure how this is played out. If he masturbates every day that they don't have sex... is it that they don't have sex cause he masturbated? or that he masturbated because op won't have sex with him? If 1: 1) Try to get to him first. if 2: 2) Quit complaining and sleep with your husband!