Health: Today, during an 8 hour shift at a very busy bowling alley, I...

By it's sharty time :/ - 02/07/2016 18:45 - United States - Bismarck

Today, during an 8 hour shift at a very busy bowling alley, I found out I can't trust a fart anymore. I'm only 25. Now I have to finish my shift commando, and also get rid of the evidence without anyone noticing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 503

You deserved it 1 766

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

Growing old sucks

By Anonymous - 07/04/2023 00:00

Today, I've gotten to that point in life where I can no longer seem to trust a fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 668

You deserved it 141

S❤️ed

By andinpublictoo - 29/10/2021 22:59

Today, and for the first time in my life, I was unable to trust a fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 723

You deserved it 224

By stink - 01/07/2015 02:40 - Australia - Sydney

Today, after working alone in a room all day, I let a fart sneak out. Just then, my drop dead gorgeous boss and two new girls walked in. I could literally see them hit the stench and cringe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 446

You deserved it 4 980

By Anonymous - 17/07/2015 17:14 - United States - West Palm Beach

Today, I felt some serious gas building up while at the supermarket. I tried to quietly fart it out, only to end up sharting myself. I had to frantically waddle out of the store as discreetly as possible as several people in the vicinity freaked out and tried to locate the source of the smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 572

You deserved it 4 359

Leaked

By Morgan Bailey - 18/09/2018 14:00

Today, I tried to let out a small fart in a crowded restaurant. I had diarrhea. I walked past several families to get to the bathroom and clean myself up, only to still go home with a huge wet spot down my ass. My shirt wasn't long enough to hide it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 729

You deserved it 879

Sneaky

By Shamed - 06/09/2011 08:06 - United Kingdom

Today, I was on the toilet at work. After a very loud and very smelly session, I waited until the other stall had been vacated to keep my anonymity. As I leant forward for some toilet roll, my ID fell out of my pocket and into the next stall. When I came out, it was face up near the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 606

You deserved it 4 953

The sweet smell of success

By NoPromotionForYou - 07/05/2020 14:00

Today, I was alone at the office. Having held it in all day, I let out the longest, worst-smelling fart of my life. The owner of the company, investigating the odd noise, opened my office door. When the stench hit him, he walked backwards all the way to his office, staring at me, in silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 473

You deserved it 608

Panic!

By Anonymous - 31/12/2023 08:00 - United States

Today, I fucked up by trusting the wrong fart and shat myself in the middle of the restaurant I was eating lunch at. I was so mortified, I couldn't even finish the meal I paid for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 248

You deserved it 460

Am I a ghost to you?

By AJ. - 19/08/2021 14:01

Today, at work, I thought I’d sneak a wee fart out, but ended up shitting myself. I just left work without telling anyone, went home, showered, then went back to work. No one missed me being away for 2 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 871

You deserved it 317

Trust issues

By Anonymous - 23/12/2023 14:00 - United States - Warren

Today, I ended up shitting myself when trying to pass what I thought was a small amount of gas, only for it to be diarrhea. I turned 37 last month. Never trust a fart, right? FML

I agree, your life sucks 458

You deserved it 196

Welshite 39

Sunday 3 July 2016 6:56

And you didn't even bring a spare. Strike one.

Tripartita 44

Sunday 3 July 2016 7:17

That's /barely/ a breach of trust, OP. The fart I hired to handle my personal finances is being investigated for tax fraud. It's so hard to find trustworthy farts nowadays.

Comments

donutcallmethat 16

Sunday 3 July 2016 21:46

Welcome to real adulthood. I remember when I was young and used to my body functioning properly the vast majority of the time. Anytime something would hurt, or go a little weird I would freak out thinking I had some life-threatening illness. Now that I've put a few miles on myself, I'm much more chill. Just wait until you get your first hemorrhoid.

Pinkponyfister 5

Monday 4 July 2016 5:00

I was told never trust someone who hasn't pooped there pants as an adult, sooo really you just became trustworthy... that's awesome

rgetting 24

Monday 4 July 2016 5:58

Been there, done that.

sidslothmann 6

Monday 4 July 2016 6:42

Truth be told. It's easier than you think. I'm 25. I'm a cop. I made that mistake once. Once.

Eivana 37

Monday 4 July 2016 9:09

It's not a huge deal going commando. Some people do it all the time. Sorry about the shart though, it can sneak up on anybody at any age.

samlovesham1234 9

Monday 4 July 2016 20:51

It happens to everyone at some point, even myself.

WillMM76 12

Tuesday 5 July 2016 4:34

You never trust a fart, kid. Remember that.

EnderNutt 16

Tuesday 5 July 2016 20:56

Congrats, fellow North Dakotan! Your FML got on the front page!

freddygasman 18

Thursday 14 July 2016 6:59

here I sit all broken hearted tried to shit but only farted so the next day I took the chance and............well op must be on day two

blair_kitty 15

Wednesday 27 July 2016 22:45

Sorry this happened to you, if it makes you feel better the same thing happened to me too. I was at my desk and let out what i thought was a small fart, it turned out to be liquid diarrhea. I was able to run to the washroom without anyone noticing, cleaned my undies and butt and went commando in skinny jeans for the rest of the day while my undies dried on my waste basket held with a clip. Going through my purse the next day i found the pair of panties i was looking for the day of the incident.