Valentine's slay, Looking good and Miscellaneous: The gays

The gays

By kolgate - 15/02/2012 10:12 - United States

Today, I called my grandmother to wish her a happy Valentine's Day. She asked me if I had a date lined up. I didn't, and before I could explain why, she responded with, "Well, maybe all the other gays went on vacation!" Thanks Grandma, I'm not gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 690

You deserved it 3 162

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Same thing different taste

The last to know

By RP Havens - 10/01/2013 06:25 - United States - Galloway

Today, my grandmother called me to tell me that there will be a nice, single guy for me to meet at the family reunion. She went on and on about how perfect he was for me. I didn't have the heart to tell her I'm a lesbian, and have been out to the rest of the family for over six years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 345

You deserved it 12 330

You can't hurry love

By Anonymous - 20/09/2009 05:18 - United States

Today, my grandma wasn't feeling well, so I went to her house to check on her. After about 20 minutes, I knew she was feeling better when she looked at me and said, "So, do you have a boyfriend yet? I pray every night that I get to live long enough to see you with a boyfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 328

You deserved it 4 056

By leonuniz - 19/04/2015 16:34 - Canada - Calgary

Today, my grandma told me point-blank that she despises gays, but that she'll go to my wedding for the booze and nothing more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 531

You deserved it 5 122

Loveless

By loveless - 18/02/2010 05:07 - United States

Today, my grandma called me to tell me that a couple of cute boys stopped by her house to borrow something. She told them all about me, and that I would be interested in them. My love life is so pathetic, even my grandmother is trying to hook me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 888

You deserved it 4 607

By Forever alone Guy - 19/02/2013 23:07 - Australia - Narre Warren

Today, I've been single for so long my grandmother had to ask if I actually like women or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 128

You deserved it 3 823

By nyebust - 01/01/2011 05:18 - United States

Today, my grandmother drunk dialed me at midnight to wish me a happy new year. I was already in bed. My grandmother has a better social life than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 208

You deserved it 8 132

By Anonymous - 09/02/2016 11:28 - United States - Lansing

Today, I took my girlfriend out for a romantic dinner, since we can't see each other this Valentine's Day. Halfway through, my aunt called, telling me my grandma had died. I had to leave because I was crying so much, leaving my girlfriend with a very pricey bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 986

You deserved it 4 452

By carebear1228 - 01/07/2014 17:31 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my grandma got a new boyfriend. She dumped the old one because "His wife was taking too long to die." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 015

You deserved it 4 765

Mystery

By Sarraahh - 19/04/2020 05:00 - Canada

Today, my 65-year-old grandmother called and asked me to tell my boyfriend that she was flattered, but she's happily married. I have no idea what she was talking about and my boyfriend refuses to talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 030

You deserved it 165

By promdump - 07/03/2009 02:55 - United States

Today, I went to visit my Grandmother, accidentally leaving my phone home during the weekend. When I got back I had 2 texts from my crush. One saying "I want to take the most beautiful girl to prom, go with me?" and the other saying, "Fine fattie, I'll ask someone else." FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 435

You deserved it 7 754

Imdead 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 22:20

Nice, I know how you feel. I'm 22 and single, so my grandmother is certain that I'm gay. I think it's kind of funny actually.

chloelovestoswim 6

Saturday 17 April 2010 4:14

yea but guys and he's a guy so it still implies gay

Comments

Amkii 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 12:35

lol What!? Maybe she said "Well, maybe all the (other) guys went on vacation!"?

chloelovestoswim 6

Saturday 17 April 2010 4:14

yea but guys and he's a guy so it still implies gay

suyci 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 12:58

that still wouldnt have to do anything with valentine #1

Amkii 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 13:56

#2, it could have something to do with Valentine's Day. Like, if everyone else went on vacation, that would explain why the submitter didn't have a date.

Imdead 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 22:20

Nice, I know how you feel. I'm 22 and single, so my grandmother is certain that I'm gay. I think it's kind of funny actually.

ZING_MASTER 0

Monday 16 February 2009 0:06

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

Seegtease 0

Monday 16 February 2009 0:09

Ah, gotta love the generation that got married at 14 and any later is proof of gayness!

grooverahul 0

Tuesday 17 February 2009 1:14

haha grand moms still have a sense of humor!

Mannerheim 0

Thursday 26 February 2009 1:06

Dude, number nine is the number one funniest guy on this site. There is something about ******* your grandmother that just makes me squeal with giddy laughter. And another thing, my parents think I'm gay, but what they don't know is I only don't show them the girls I date, cause none of them have ever been white AND attractive at the same time!