Health: Surprise! - FML

Surprise!

By Anonymous - 12/02/2011 18:40 - United States

Today, I went in to the doctor's thinking I had a bladder infection. I walked out knowing I'm pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 337

You deserved it 16 684

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 27/11/2010 15:03 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor's office for a minor cold, and left with a diagnosis of pregnancy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 477

You deserved it 15 446

By Anonymous - 24/01/2011 00:22 - United States

Today, I was at my doctor's office. I thought I had a kidney stone. Turns out I'm pregnant and I have a kidney stone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 459

You deserved it 5 391

Too little, too late

By Anonymous - 20/01/2014 20:23 - United States - Manhattan

Today, I went to the health department to get on some birth control. I left the health department without birth control, and with the news that I'm pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 389

You deserved it 33 869

By Anna - 20/01/2019 16:00

Today, I went into a gynecology appointment to find out my IUD had apparently fallen out without me knowing. What tipped me off? My pregnancy test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 774

You deserved it 302

Science has gone too far

By Amanda - 15/09/2021 13:00 - United States - Greenbrier

Today, I went in for a full hysterectomy due to medical issues. I came out being 6 weeks pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 995

You deserved it 157

Nearly home

By clumsycat - 30/06/2017 15:54

Today, I thought my water had broken. I'd actually just peed myself when the baby moved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 304

You deserved it 385

By XxOx - 04/02/2010 01:18 - France

Today, my mom is going with me for a general check-up at the doctor's office. She just told me she had a nightmare last night that she went to the doctor with me, and he told her I'm pregnant. I am pregnant. I was about to tell her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 666

You deserved it 7 707

Yeet it

By Anonymous - 25/02/2021 23:00 - Canada

Today, I finally had my doctor's appointment to get my tubes tied. I've been waiting for 2 years. Instead, I found out that my birth control failed and I'm pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 136

You deserved it 142

By actually just constipated.. and stupid - 04/03/2015 15:03 - Tunisia

Today, I went to the doctor, because I've been having stomach pains and nausea for weeks. He ended up gravely telling me I'm pregnant. I freaked out and panicked about what my parents would say. Then his laughter reminded me that I'm a guy. A really stupid one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 355

You deserved it 37 966

By whotouchedyou1 - 26/08/2014 02:37 - United States - Cypress

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 188

You deserved it 11 765

Next

Top comments

Doortje 29

Saturday 12 February 2011 22:29

Don't worry, in a few more months you'll probably have that bladder infection too.

xXxSophiexXx 8

Saturday 12 February 2011 22:25

I guess next time use protection...

Comments

twizlersrock 0

Friday 15 July 2011 5:39

that's not that bad now you'll have a child. u should b happy

ts10873 0

Tuesday 2 August 2011 3:33

It's still an infection, this one just lasts the rest of your life.

ohlalala_fml 0

Wednesday 7 September 2011 9:12

90% of bladder infections are caused by sex. But not necessarily because Im suffering from one right now and Im a virgin. Just take some prescribed anti-biotics, and within five days you should be fine. :)

moosicaddict 0

Thursday 26 January 2012 17:13

Are trying to say you ****** your doctor?

laelia611 0

Tuesday 14 February 2012 23:21

that's not a fml. Thats you being an ass.

gitaly101 3

Wednesday 11 April 2012 13:25

Well I don't know if now would be the time to say congrats...

gitaly101 3

Wednesday 11 April 2012 13:27

What the hell is wrong with u #30!? Seriously?

Objectofdespair 1

Tuesday 22 May 2012 1:14

WIN!

aklm15 14

Wednesday 17 July 2013 4:56

Don't be silly, wrap his willy!

blackwidowtaco 31

Monday 19 August 2013 21:17

That's pretty effed up you didn't already know.

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Today, one of my roommates blew a fuse by running a personal heater on full overnight. I notified our landlady that I had to get a new fuse; she came over to pay me for it. Only as I heard landlady's horn did I see another roommate's girlfriend's car; she stayed overnight and isn't allowed to. Both roomies got evicted and blamed me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 91

Today, I lost all hope of finding a man. I’m gonna be 34 and I can’t get a date to save my life. I was cursed with a facial deformity and 285lbs of weight, making all men run for the hills. All of my younger sisters have got married and started families. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 194

The Top

Today, I was notified that the company did not give me a raise two months ago like I thought. The increase was a typo. Two months ago I wrote a thank you for the raise email to my boss. Now I get to write a check to the company to pay back my "raise." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 747

You deserved it 3 233

Today, I was helping an old man find a pair of shoes. I told him about a particularly comfortable pair but had to inform him that they only came in black or white. Hearing this, the old man grabbed me around the neck and began to beat me in the head with our display shoe. He wanted brown. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 149

You deserved it 4 228

Today, I had my boss over for dinner. Knowing that I was angling for a promotion, my fifteen-year-old son spent the dinner uttering lines such as "What's the point of showering before bed?" and "Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks." My boss was not impressed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 144

You deserved it 4 920

Today, my separation anxiety got so intense, I found myself smelling my boyfriend's pillow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 494

You deserved it 8 760

Today, after finally getting up the nerve to take my motorcycle to up 75mph on the freeway, I made it off in one piece, only to fall off my bike in the mall parking lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 929

You deserved it 25 592

Today, I met my favourite singer, but when she signed my CD, the marker was out of ink. By the time I realised there was no signature, she was already gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 160

You deserved it 397