So start showing up on time

Yeah! How dare he think ahead and predict you'd be late! That's not a new development! You're always late! He should have learned to live with it by now! The absolute gall!

You hate that he's a smug smarmy bellend because he's figured out your always late? You are a real peach.

One of you is consistently a jerk here and it ain’t him. Why are you even with him if you can’t stand him?

You realize that if you are persistently that late, you're wasting other people's time. You have a problem. Your husband has come to expect it and live with it, but it's still early in the new year, so set a resolution to stop being late and respecting others' time more.

This is one of my favorite FMLs of all time, because I learned the word 'bellend', which is awesome.

So start being on time. He's not being smug, he's solving a problem before it arises. You're annoyed that he knew you'd be late, and you think that makes him smug for planning on you being late. You are an annoying, disrespectful, and rude person who doesn't appreciate other people's time. If my husband planned a date, and I was 45 minutes late, he'd be pissed, and rightfully so. YOUR husband, instead of being pissed, made accommodations. And you're annoyed? Seriously... you're a piece of work.

So you're actually complaining that your husband works around your chronic latenesses instead of bitching at you about it? wow

I love that he knows you that well and that you were willing to share this embarrassing situation here on the site. Sounds like a great relationship to me!