Love: Scary

Scary

By Anonymous - 22/08/2012 20:08 - United States

Today, I realized how much I hate my girlfriend, when I got excited as the doctor told me I should refrain from having sex for the next two months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 792

You deserved it 31 410

May weddings: Love and blunders
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Same thing different taste

Take a ticket

By ugh - 24/05/2015 19:53 - United States - Dearborn

Today, I realized that my relationship has hit a new low when I made an appointment with my girlfriend to have sex. I have a two week wait. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 117

You deserved it 5 117

By Anonymous - 08/01/2013 05:20 - United States

Today, I got into an accident on my motorcycle. When I told my wife that the doctor said I couldn't have sex for two weeks, she couldn't contain her joy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 002

You deserved it 8 736

Childfree

By Anonymous - 17/08/2015 08:33 - United States

Today, after hearing the doctor saying my girlfriend can never be pregnant, I got a bit too excited. I'm currently on the 5th hour of the silent treatment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 698

You deserved it 42 879

By rawdoglyfe69 - 17/04/2013 06:14 - United States - Helena

Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 479

You deserved it 6 074

Get it on

By Anon - 13/07/2023 00:02

Today, my girlfriend raged furiously at me for never initiating sex. The reason I haven't been initiating is because she was on a medically-ordered sex ban, and she "forgot to tell me" that her doctor had cleared her two weeks ago. She's still mad at me, and there's still no sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 032

You deserved it 171

By beaverless - 02/05/2011 20:26 - United States

Today, my girlfriend kindly broke the news to me that she doesn't want to take part in any sexual activity anymore because it's getting too boring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 526

You deserved it 17 577

Turntables

By Bill Mantie - 18/04/2021 02:00

Today, after months of successfully taking strides to boost my long diminished libido, I found out my girlfriend, who always had a healthy sex drive, has now lost hers. Oh, how the tables have turned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 101

You deserved it 140

Show and tell

By Boyufd - 22/04/2020 23:00

Today, it was the first time I was about to have sex with my girlfriend of 3 years, since I'm self-conscious about my size. When she saw it, she started laughing. She was mad I didn't want to continue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 137

You deserved it 280

By Jack - 30/11/2013 08:31 - United States - Reynoldsburg

Today, I realized my girlfriend has been "on her period" for almost two months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 457

You deserved it 12 071

By baron - 01/06/2009 17:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 131 643

You deserved it 7 568

Hockeyboy4280 18

Wednesday 22 August 2012 23:43

First ever guy to get excited over those words...

deadxwedding84 5

Wednesday 22 August 2012 23:43

Ouch. Maybe you should dump her?

Comments

venomousddog 19

Thursday 23 August 2012 22:12

Everyone has been saying this, but you guys should brake up, you guys need to be happy with someone you love

deemoe 5

Thursday 23 August 2012 22:33

Ur life sucks cause u cant have sex for two months

vannee23 3

Friday 24 August 2012 4:53

Do you people even understand what he is saying!!! She have him a disease so that's why he hates her!!!!

simonepedretti 7

Friday 24 August 2012 7:35

how bout breaking up with her instead of leading her on asshole

MriFunny 6

Friday 24 August 2012 10:27

And yet she's still your girlfriend...

ramakandra 3

Friday 24 August 2012 12:55

if you hate her, why dont you ditch her? afraid you cant get someone else?

irritatedone 5

Friday 24 August 2012 19:51

If you're getting excited about NOT having sex with your girlfriend then maybe try it with a guy. Who knows, you might be gay and just don't know it yet. Just sayin'.