Awkward, Toys and Love: One day…

One day…

By CaeliLady - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my friend and I were at the mall and saw a "Grow Your Own Boyfriend" toy. I remarked that I already had one of those, and she freaked out, very loudly and openly, about me "finally having a boyfriend". I had to embarrassingly explain I meant I had the toy... not an actual boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 402

You deserved it 6 491

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

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Same thing different taste

Very funny, Mom

By ThanksMa - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, my mother and I walked past my boyfriend, whom she's never met. After we casually greeted each other and went on our way, my mother said, "He's cute. Who is he?" I paused for a second and replied, "That's my boyfriend." She then said, "Does he know that?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 096

You deserved it 14 552

Creepy

By Fail - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I thought I'd surprise my girlfriend with a bear hug. I found her in the hall with her back to me, talking to friends. As I walked up behind her and was about to wrap my arms around her, she said, "So… does anyone have any ideas about how I should break it off with my boyfriend?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 425

You deserved it 3 110

Secret

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's one year old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 023

You deserved it 2 884

By grrrr - 12/02/2011 19:00 - United States

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. Feeling bad, I texted him a few hours later apologizing. He said it was fine and that he went ahead and picked up a girl from the mall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 132

You deserved it 48 194

By thatonekid - 27/07/2009 23:10 - United States

Today, my best friend told me she was pregnant over the phone. While in the middle of telling her congrats, she told me it was with my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 477

You deserved it 3 545

Bizarre love triangle

By addicted2v - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I found out the guy that my girlfriend introduced as her brother was actually her boyfriend. I also paid for him to come out with us to the movies several times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 593

You deserved it 4 254

Gym bro

By kaplwv116 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my extremely in-shape boyfriend told me he hasn't had a chance to work out lately. I jokingly poked him in the belly saying he's getting chunky and winked. He burst into tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 054

You deserved it 41 205

By Rumors - 12/12/2013 11:27 - United States - Turtle Lake

Today, a rumor was spread around that I was dating somebody. I confronted the person who everyone thought I was dating, and asked him about it. He also thought we were dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 667

You deserved it 6 100

Yada yada yade

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while waiting for my mom to pick me up from university, I took out my phone and pretended to talk to someone. I didn't think people still pointed and laughed, but apparently they do when your mom pulls up and shouts, "Stop pretending to talk to someone." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 037

You deserved it 33 781

Scary!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, all because he's scared of my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 207

You deserved it 5 870

ilg4evr 0

Monday 14 September 2009 9:51

What's the point of those toys? That's retarded. And it's pretty obvious what you meant; when I read this, I knew you were talking about the toy. You'd say you already "had one," not "had one of those." FYL cause you have an idiot friend

my_fml_account 2

Monday 14 September 2009 10:17

Just remember to give it plenty of water and sunlight, and soon you too will have a boyfriend!

Comments

OlonixBAMF 0

Tuesday 15 September 2009 0:43

scottitup has one of those!

lifeislife_fml 0

Tuesday 15 September 2009 1:39

I hate it when people make huuuge scenes out of little things (like friends supposedly having boyfriends) in public.

cheetahboo2010 5

Tuesday 15 September 2009 2:46

Umm it's not a TOTAL shame not to have a boyfriend, definitely not worth making it as an FML.

ik_im_not_funny 0

Tuesday 15 September 2009 7:24

most girls wish they could make their boy friends grow. more so in asian men specifically

rinzlerkitty94 31

Friday 4 March 2016 23:25

Apparently you don't know much about vaginas. After 4 inches, we can't really feel it anymore. Asian men are perfectly capable of satisfying me, and they have.

gargoyle666 5

Tuesday 15 September 2009 15:40

You're in Kansas and don't have a boyfriend? What's the matter, not have any brothers?

CaeliLady 0

Friday 25 September 2009 1:16

Kansas is not a Southern state. Get your stereotypes correct, dude.

teiso_fml 0

Wednesday 16 September 2009 12:44

If it makes you feel any better, I've never had a boyfriend, either, and I couldn't care less whether people think I'm late for it or not. Do your own thing, on your own time, screw everyone else.

aremymind 0

Thursday 17 September 2009 4:55

I hoped you where going to make a giant penis joke but that wouldn't be an FML

sjmrawr 0

Monday 5 October 2009 14:13

One of my friends bought me a "grow your own boyfriend" for my birthday one year. She said it was so I would stop dating so many real ones and leave some for everyone else.