Health, Embarrassing, Roommate and Farts: Night time entertainment

Night time entertainment

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, I woke up next to my roommate staring in horror. She said I was singing and farting in my sleep. Loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 276

You deserved it 423

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Freak out

By zAstonish - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night and felt deep breathing on my neck. I screamed, fell off the bed and busted my nose. It was just my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 248

You deserved it 4 191

Dude, what the…?

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I woke up to my apartment filled with smoke, fire alarms blaring. My roommate set my kitchen on fire while making hot dogs. This is the fourth time this has happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 031

You deserved it 4 741

The smell test

By sosadstudent - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Netherlands

Today, I realized I can tell which one of my 6 roommates has taken a dump, just based on the smell emanating from the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 097

You deserved it 4 449

By Myriam - 18/06/2012 16:05 - Maldives - Male

Today, my husband recorded me getting out of bed and sleepwalking all the way into the backyard and straight into our pool. He was too busy giggling like a schoolgirl to help me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 852

You deserved it 3 407

Sounds promising

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend of two years expressing my feelings for her. She responded with, "I'm going to bed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 760

You deserved it 3 212

Hungover

By RedheadA - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my husband and I woke up to see my drunk mother passed out on our couch. She was wearing nothing but socks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 633

You deserved it 3 687

Bad boy

By Shiva - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - France - Niort

Today, I cleaned my apartment from top to bottom. Once I was done, I looked over at my puppy, who then woke up, stretched, got out of his basket and started to pee. I shouted, "No!" Scared, he then ran all over the place, still peeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 779

You deserved it 9 641

Self report

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was with my 3 year-old son in the doctor's office. During the exam, he informed the doctor that he doesn't sleep in mommy's bed anymore because mommy sleeps in her underwear and farts all night long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 695

You deserved it 8 754

Glade

By stinkystinky - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff

Today, after cleaning the whole house, I still couldn't get rid of the foul smell. Later, my roommate revealed his new place to "stash and dry" his socks: The ventilation ducts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 931

You deserved it 964

I'm OK!

By MAC. - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada - Toronto

Today, I slammed the car door on my head while I was getting in the car. If that wasn't bad enough, my boyfriend is convinced I now have a concussion and insists on waking me up every hour to make sure I'm still alive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 439

You deserved it 6 023

BurnInDemonFire 33

Wednesday 24 October 2018 6:05

Can't wait to see you on America's Got Talent, or one of its sister shows.

JustThatPerson 21

Saturday 10 November 2018 20:04

WAKE ME UP INSIDES

Comments

BurnInDemonFire 33

Wednesday 24 October 2018 6:05

Can't wait to see you on America's Got Talent, or one of its sister shows.

Takegami 22

Saturday 10 November 2018 15:55

Someone told me I do metal vocals in my sleep. So you’re fine

BurnInDemonFire 33

Saturday 10 November 2018 19:55

Miley Cyrus isn't metal, dude.

r 8

Saturday 10 November 2018 16:14

It was a musical for the senses

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 10 November 2018 19:04

Looks like you put another tuba player out of work.

whiskey'swino 15

Saturday 10 November 2018 20:02

Why in horror? She should be posting that to youtube, you'll be an internet sensation!

JustThatPerson 21

Saturday 10 November 2018 20:04

WAKE ME UP INSIDES

BurnInDemonFire 33

Sunday 11 November 2018 1:27

"SAVE ME FROM THE SOMETHING IN MY BUM!"

wanted_2_want 40

Saturday 10 November 2018 21:47

If you were in a rithmic tune then you’re awesome.

BeachMammal 8

Saturday 10 November 2018 22:49

If she reacts to that with horror, she has led a very sheltered life indeed.

rcrumbak 9

Sunday 11 November 2018 22:08

Total eclipse of the FART!

Xavier K. Valdez 8

Saturday 9 February 2019 0:35

Lol what the ****? That is awesome!

Keywords

Public freakouts Health Relatable Scams Geek Music Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Bikes Transportation Cops Kids Fight Family AITA Mother in law Miscellaneous Relationship advice Social Media Love Art Work Students Noise Birds Animals Sleep Mental health Medication

The Top

Today, our company got hacked. Our secretary fell for someone badly impersonating the head of customer service and sent them a full list of employee information from one of our new clients. The boss wants to blame us in IT for not training her on how to avoid this. He fell for a phishing attack last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 480

You deserved it 74

Today, I learned my dad is the kindest, most generous, hard-working soul anyone has ever met. He'll give someone the shirt off his back if they need help. Except for us, his immediate family, whom he screams and cusses at daily, expects to do everything ourselves, and thinks we're incompetent when we need help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 498

You deserved it 91

The Top

Today, my sister drove past me while i was walking home in the rain, she honked to let me know she was there, and kept on driving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 749

You deserved it 3 511

Today, I saw a video of myself filmed last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming, "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" while naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 355

You deserved it 175

Today, I went to get a haircut and the first thing the lady asked was, "So, do you want to keep the mullet?" What mullet?! FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 543

You deserved it 5 028

Today, it was the first day of my new job. It was also the last day of my new job. I got a call immediately after finishing my shift to be told the company has "decided to go in a different direction" and will no longer be needing my services. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 808

You deserved it 847

Today, my long-distance boyfriend decided to tell me he found a girl in his hometown he’s become attracted to, and that he doesn’t love me anymore. He says we can "still be friends." I’d just driven 100 miles to see him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 058

You deserved it 118

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he wanted to make the most of his 1 month X-Box Live coupon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 399

You deserved it 7 013

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Comments