Love, Pregnancy, Cheating and Miscellaneous: News to me

News to me

By RBEE - 12/12/2009 18:02 - France

Today, my colleague rushed off to the hospital for the birth of his first son. Having met his wife at the Christmas party a couple of years ago, I called to congratulate her. Shame I didn't realize it was his mistress having the baby. Guess who broke the news to the wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 725

You deserved it 4 175

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 04/08/2015 01:28 - United States - Anchorage

Today, I met my wife's mistress, at the maternity ward in the hospital, after she gave birth to our second child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 780

You deserved it 2 143

Nervous

By R…… - 28/10/2009 22:29 - United Kingdom

Today, at work, we were gathered to be told some bad news. One of our colleagues would be taking indefinite leave because his wife had dropped their newborn baby. I accidentally laughed at the image. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 681

You deserved it 61 809

By wow - 15/04/2013 18:36 - Russian Federation - Saint Petersburg

Today, my husband of 6 years said in a grave voice that he had some important news for me. Jokingly, I said, "Why, did you get that cute colleague of yours pregnant?" He did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 945

You deserved it 6 734

By Flabbergasted - 06/02/2009 21:32 - United States

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has been having an affair with another woman. He works with me and the woman also works in the same company. She is also married and is now 6 months pregnant. They are throwing a baby shower for her on Monday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 755

You deserved it 2 252

By Anonymous - 29/12/2012 08:25 - United States - Sun Prairie

Today, at the hospital I work at, I had to deliver my best friend's baby. I later found out that my ex boyfriend was the father. Normally this wouldn't faze me, but it did because we broke up last month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 742

You deserved it 3 110

By mystery - 17/06/2012 02:08 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. She hadn't even called me; I saw the news on my Facebook news feed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 725

You deserved it 2 389

By Anonymous - 14/02/2015 02:43 - United States - Titusville

Today, I gave birth to a baby girl. Where was my husband after the agony finally ended? Standing just outside the room, flirting with a nurse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 251

You deserved it 3 525

News to me

By Whitney - 09/10/2022 02:30

Today, my best friend called me and told me she was in the hospital in labor. Excited, I rush to the hospital. Once I arrived, I saw my boyfriend of 4 years in the room. I asked him what he was doing there and my friend says, “You wanna tell her or should I?” Turns out he’s leaving me for her. The baby is his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 611

You deserved it 134

Suspicious coincidence?

By Confused - 20/05/2023 15:00

Today, my wife had our first child. He's identical to her coworker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 953

You deserved it 130

Asshat

By Julissa - 25/02/2021 00:30

Today, I got a call from my husband, saying that he wants a divorce, he’s been seeing his colleague and that she’s more compatible to him. I’ve just given birth to out first child. He told me, "Aww, good luck with that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 869

You deserved it 117

fmlcomment 2

Saturday 12 December 2009 23:12

...if he wanted it kept secret, why was he telling everyone at his work?

dracer 0

Saturday 12 December 2009 23:20

Ooops, but at least you got the wife into the clearing! It's about time she saw through the cheating bastard this colleague of yours is!

Comments

ArielTheMermaid 17

Tuesday 12 July 2011 21:13

did it not occur to everyone calling 'fake' that OP could have been expecting to leave a voicemail?

ZXDriver 0

Sunday 27 November 2011 6:39

Wait.. If she's in the hospital having a kid.. What the hell are you doing calling her right now?

newburton13 26

Thursday 1 March 2012 1:23

It was the colleague's mistress having the kid, not his wife.

alialley 10

Wednesday 1 August 2012 12:20

I think #112 was simply asking, if you think she's in the hospital going through contractions, why call her?

newburton13 26

Thursday 1 March 2012 1:25

You did the right thing, man.

InvisibleMonster_fml 16

Friday 30 March 2012 21:22

Probably OP called afterwards.

alialley 10

Wednesday 1 August 2012 12:18

Why is this *your* FML?

PurpleDrankkx 7

Monday 11 November 2013 20:03

Ooooohhh my god. That really sucks.

bazookajoey 27

Friday 31 January 2014 6:30

Was sooo not your fault OP.

The_Mad_Writer 3

Friday 11 April 2014 3:39

Ouch.... that'd be the worse ever

doglover100 28

Thursday 24 April 2014 5:27

She was going to find out eventually.

NamelessFace 22

Wednesday 13 August 2014 21:25

Not your fault. Besides, you know no one else was gonna tell her.

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The Top

Today, my house was broken into. The burglar didn't steal my brand new laptop, iPad or TV. They instead made off with every single item of clothing I own. When I went to turn on my TV to try and distract myself from this, I found all of the cables in back missing. The police don't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 167

You deserved it 2 954

Today, after waiting two weeks for an email with my online textbook access code, it still hadn't arrived in time for my quiz tomorrow, so I ended up spending most of my money on the expensive physical copy. Not long after I got back home, the email finally arrived. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 204

You deserved it 5 035

The Top

Today, despite the fact that we are well off and desperate to be parents, my sister refuses to let us adopt her unborn baby, and intends to “raise him on her own.” We earn twice what she does and have been trying to conceive or adopt for 7 years, and she doesn’t even have a husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 119

You deserved it 2 326

Today, my ex girlfriend is sleeping over at my house. At some point while she was preparing to dump me, she became best friends with my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 149

You deserved it 2 797

Today, I got into a screaming match with the mother of my kids. I told her they need to bathe more often. According to her, anything more than once a week is excessive and bad for their skin. My kids play sports and smell like puppies from the pound. She doesn’t care. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 399

You deserved it 205

Today, my pet hedgehog thought it would be funny to roll around in the kitty litter. It was like washing a poopy cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 410

You deserved it 4 580

Today, when my boyfriend came over he was on his phone. We spent about 15 minutes together before having sex, then he made a phone call and said he had to leave. I could hear him from my window apologising to his coworker because he “just had to do something real quick but was now free to talk again.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 336

You deserved it 138

Today, I sent a friend request on facebook to the only person I became friends with this semester at college. He denied me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 177

You deserved it 4 363

News to me

Same thing different taste

Nervous

News to me

Suspicious coincidence?

Asshat

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