Health, Babies, Motherhood and Love: Milkmaid

Milkmaid

By Heifer - 16/05/2009 21:41 - United States

Today, when done feeding my newborn, I stated to my husband that I'm a cow. He said, in a sincere tone, "Oh, baby, you'll lose the weight soon." I meant cow because I'm producing so much milk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 935

You deserved it 21 331

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Same thing different taste

By wmkaz - 21/04/2012 06:15 - Canada - Sault Sainte Marie

Today, I am six months pregnant and have been lactating. When I noticed this and pointed it out to my husband, I jokingly stated that I felt like a cow. He then replied. "Oh, you're not a cow. At most you're just a fat pig." He still has no clue why I'm upset. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 165

You deserved it 5 027

By brittrod - 05/12/2011 01:13 - United States

Today, when my mother-in-law told me I was losing weight, my husband started laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 036

You deserved it 3 384

By notpreggo - 01/05/2017 12:00

Today, I was taking my 3-month-old nephew for a walk in his stroller, when a lady stopped me to coo over him. Then she patted my stomach and said, "Don't worry, you'll lose the baby weight soon". I've never had a baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 994

You deserved it 698

Early learner

By Courtney Micallef - 02/04/2020 08:00

Today, I was teaching my one year-old some new words. He pointed to the picture of a pig and said, "Mama". Guess I better start that diet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 505

You deserved it 311

By Scott - 15/09/2011 07:34 - United States

Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 280

You deserved it 6 412

By Anonymous - 19/08/2012 05:30 - United States

Today, in the middle of the store, my daughter pointed at my belly and loudly announced that she was going to have a brother. I'm a man, and apparently I need to lose weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 763

You deserved it 5 939

By princessj - 16/10/2010 05:50 - United States

Today, my 4 year old son told his preschool teacher that his daddy could pick up 10,000 cows but couldn't pick up his mommy because she was too heavy. I'm the mommy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 875

You deserved it 6 143

By gamerlaura - 21/07/2016 22:09 - United Kingdom - Blaenau-ffestiniog

Today, I went to the store to get groceries. After getting all the stuff I need, and was heading towards the checkout point, I heard a baby cry and instantly felt coldness on my shirt. Yes I was lactating, and yes it was noticeable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 694

You deserved it 1 473

Mommy milkers

By Anonymous - 30/09/2009 05:17 - Malaysia

Today, we ran out of milk and my 4 year-old son came up to me and asked if he could "milk" my wife's breasts for his cereal. Apparently, he thinks my wife doesn't love him and his sister is selfish for not sharing her milk. His sister is only one month old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 136

You deserved it 4 255

I love the countryside

By disturbed - 01/06/2014 01:53 - Ireland

Today, I was hit in the face by the placenta of a cow that had just given birth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 993

You deserved it 5 705

strawberry_78 0

Sunday 17 May 2009 1:58

Ah, I could understand his mistake, double meaning! You said it!!!

umlautasaur 0

Sunday 17 May 2009 2:00

I don't see how this is an FML. You have baby weight. Your husband isn't making a huge deal of it. BTW, "cow" is usually synonymous with being overweight. All mammals breastfeed.

Comments

grlwitperlEring 0

Sunday 17 May 2009 1:57

Haha wow well at least he tried to catch himself

2gether4ever 0

Friday 9 April 2010 5:19

...you walked RIGHT into that one.

cloverpi314 4

Friday 23 April 2010 1:35

haha!! this one IS funny!!

sulitak 27

Friday 17 May 2013 10:52

I'm not seeing the "catch himself" part... but I mean he was being an awesome hubby!

wowfmlife 0

Sunday 17 May 2009 1:57

hahaha, you should have been more specific

noah1213 0

Friday 3 June 2011 5:18

bo burnham :D!

strawberry_78 0

Sunday 17 May 2009 1:58

Ah, I could understand his mistake, double meaning! You said it!!!

invisibledamage 2

Sunday 17 May 2009 1:59

*facepalm*

mnbbv 0

Sunday 11 April 2010 2:35

lol u said it... this happened yo me too...

Darkalex256 0

Sunday 17 May 2009 2:00

Next time dont make fun of yourself Lessons of life lol

kmander93 0

Sunday 17 May 2009 2:00

Awwwww that sucks....

manoverboard 0

Sunday 17 May 2009 2:00

...well, isn't it good that he said you'd lose it, though? At least he didn't say anything mean. :/

umlautasaur 0

Sunday 17 May 2009 2:00

I don't see how this is an FML. You have baby weight. Your husband isn't making a huge deal of it. BTW, "cow" is usually synonymous with being overweight. All mammals breastfeed.

laurendrew 2

Thursday 17 June 2010 23:23

8, I don't see how this is a FML either. He could of said "Damn right, you're a fat bitch, now go make me a sandwich." which would be worse? :D

kyliebear 15

Saturday 6 October 2012 20:09

I don't think so. Cows produce milk, so if you produce milk you're like a cow. Overweight people would be known as pigs or something like that. Edit: Also, no offence to pigs in this comment.