Me me me

By perfectmoment - 30/11/2009 00:47 - Canada

Today, I called my boyfriend to have a shoulder to cry on because my grandpa died. As soon as I told him, he started crying and telling me how much he missed his grandmother, who died six years ago. I spent the majority of the phone call listening to him wail. FML
I agree, your life sucks 33 570
You deserved it 5 997

Same thing different taste

Top comments

caticaticati 3

You add the 'who died six years ago' as if that changes how much it sucks to lose someone. Sometimes my friends' facebook statuses say something about their grandmas/grandpas/other close family dying, and I get really upset thinking about my grandma that died in a car accident 2 years ago. And anytime anyone tries to talk about a car accident they were in, I get upset as well. Some people are sensitive and it's possible that your boyfriend was really close to his grandma, or that he bottled up his emotions after her death and has a hard time dealing with them now. It sucks that you didn't exactly get the comfort you wanted, but at least you have someone who can relate to you and help you. When my boyfriend and I met, we got to talking about the car accident I was in (the one my grandma died in) within the first week of dating - it was only 7 months after it happened and I started getting kind of upset talking about it. My not-yet-boyfriend then told me that he had lost his grandpa earlier in that year - it helped me to know know that I now knew someone who had been through what I had been through in some sense. Try to be understanding and arrange a day for your boyfriend and yourself to get together and talk about memories and such - I'm sure it will be helpful for both of you. I'm very sorry for your loss. I suggest finding a grief group - they're really helpful sometimes.

so? I know somebody who's grandma died when they were 4 (they're 22 now) and they are still sad sometimes. So its ok for you to cry but not for him? And let me guess: you weren't sad anymore?

Comments

joemk2012 0

Just have him over and have a big tear fest. It will inevitably lead to sex.

sarcdude 3

I don't think you're a bitch or that either one of you were right or wrong. I just think, idk, it might have conjured up some bad memories and you two could've had an especially tender "let's grieve together" moment.

Unsure_1 0

So you would have him listen to you but you don't want to listen to him. Did you ever think that maybe it still hurts that his grandma passed away. I get that yours just did and you want somebody to listen to you but be reasonable. Maybe you should have him over and listen to each other.

My BF does this shit all the time. I go to him with something I'm upset about and he'll turn it around on himself and throw his own pity party. Now I don't tell him anything. It sucks. There's a time and a place for it, don't steal *my* thunder and *my* party.

My ex did similar things. I was talking to him about how scared I was about the medical appointment the next day about why I was getting worse after my brain surgery and ended up with him sobbing the entire night about him not sure what course he wants to do at uni. I don't think one situation was more important then the other it was just bad timing. I had already spent my time counseling him about how most 19yr olds did not know what their career was going to be countless times before. Lots of people love stealing thunder like that, I have just given up trying to get help because whenever I do need someone to talk about my severe medical problems and how scared I am there is always a completely randomly argument between others or they sob about their life. Like before its not that their pain or issues are any less but at that moment its not time to bring it up.

ayyeitssammy 0

wow. you dont even know if they were really close or not. Really all of you who agree with her arent very simpathetic. why should he care about what you have to say if you dont care about him .

Or we just understand turning someone else's problem only about you is an issue? Learn to listen as well as talk about your experience, both can share the grief and comfort each orher

dudethatsuxxx 0

you shouldn't be so selfish maybe he legit misses her and you just reminded him and HE ended up being the one needing a shoulder to cry on.

I think I might know you... my friend's grandpa just died..? and also I live in Ontario Canada

whatthefuckcunt 0

HO-LY SHIT! i live in ontario canada too and I know someone who's grandpa just died! it MUST be the same person, since the odds of 3 people knowing someone who's grandpa died and live in ontario is just IMPOSSIBLE!!!