Divine

By toomuch - 22/11/2011 09:36 - Australia

Spicy
Today, I went to my doctor. I casually asked him why I keep getting headaches after I masturbate. He said it probably was a sign from God. FML
I agree, your life sucks 40 400
You deserved it 12 878
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Top comments

RedPillSucks 31

You're doing it wrong. You should be getting head, not getting a headache.

369 12
Mayshod 3

Screw you doc! ************ is safe sex with someone I love very much.

193 7

Comments

Haha_oh_wait 4

Find a doctor that isn't a religious nut.

44 24
TipOfTheHat 10

Well, keep up the good work, you'll get in shape eventually with your "hands on" approach to exercise!

20 3
Snafuusmc 12

Slow down drink more water and try to do it 2-3 times a week or atleast close to it.

8 6
perdix 29

Well, God killed Onan for masturbating, but he's only giving you headaches. I'd say you got off easy.

76 14
KVKdragon 26

God killed Onan for spilling his seed on the ground when he was copulating with someone that He wanted to be pregnant :/

12 8
perdix 29

That's funny. We all know that the pull-out method (coitus interruptus) doesn't work. If God wanted Tamar to be pregnant, He would have made it fail for Onan, too.

21 3
Cmdr_Shepard 17

Doesn't God have better things to do than give guys who ********** headaches? You were better off just googling your symptoms rather than visiting that doctor.

26 5
Okayitwasme 0

Okay, this also could be a sign that you have very high cholesterol. Some people regardless of diet have high cholesterol. Meaning the arteries are not pumping enough blood. Also causes headaches after sex. There are pills for that. By the way OP change doctors! Just because he gets to put DR in front of his name doesn't say he graduated at the top of his class.

21 2
Ray_of_midnight 22

OMGWTF? I'm not an M.D. but having a headache when you ****** could mean all sorts of stuff, some of it serious, some not. You could be inadvertently straining muscles in your neck and back, triggering a tension headache, or you could have a serious cardiac or blood pressure issue. Find a different doc, one who knows WTF he or she is talking about, and get it sorted out, pronto. And you should be really angry at your current doctor for ascribing a divine origin to what could be a sign of a serious medical problem, rather than investigating further.

33 2
Savra_fml 17

Your doctor is a moron. If you believed him, you are one too. Religion and medicine do not mix! No need to get a second opinion, you just need to get a real one from a real doctor. Most probable cause is high blood pressure so check that out.

25 6
123jdub 7

I don't care what anyone thinks, that's funny shit right there

6 29