Dreams, Farts and Love: Broken dreams - FML

Broken dreams

By dreamteam - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was having a very realistic dream about a hot guy. Just as he was leaning in to ravish me, I was rudely awakened by the sound of my husband farting and snorting at the same time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 912

You deserved it 12 643

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Top comments

Jimboom 11

Monday 8 February 2010 16:36

That wasn't your husbands fart that awoke you... it was reality. ;)

SailorButterfly 8

Monday 8 February 2010 16:37

Hey, that hot guy would probably fart and snore if you married him too. Men are men! lol

Comments

tjp1284 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 1:04

haha that's some funny shit .

DonkeyDelight 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 1:12

Also known as "fnorting".

GreenRupee 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 1:39

YDI for complaining about humanity.

elizanena9 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 1:56

hahaha! hot. a dream come true.

Lattenkiste 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 2:05

That's karma's way of saying "Eat shit, *****"

koirakuen 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 2:28

what ever i feed my girlfriend, house her, give her good love. she practically lives off me and my hard work. if i knew she was even dreaming about someone else when i am doing everything for her (except for maybe cleaning), i will throw her on the streets. luckily this won't likely happen to her. she'd probably be homeless without me i'd assume it's the same for the op. she doesn't deserve that man, worthless *****

voice_of_reasonx 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 2:33

YDI.

thor89 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 2:42

you're husbands the greatest

EmWeeWing 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 3:08

Your husband is amazing. How could you dream about someone else?

fullmetal93 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 3:15

appriciate your husband more, need you be ravashed in your dreams? how ungreatful

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Keywords

Management Work Love Jealousy Relatable Relationship advice Mental health Miscellaneous Friends Awkward Health Healthy Lifestyle Ironic Food Family Money Birthday Mother in law Gifts Public freakouts Education Parents Students Exams Pranks Weird Argument AITA Insects Fear

The Top

Today, I found out why I’ve been covering most of the bills and the rent. Turns out my boyfriend is paying a very expensive OnlyFans subscription for his female bestie. When I confronted him about it, he responded by yelling, “It’s not like that!” and punched our glass patio door, shattering it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 576

You deserved it 241

Today, my otherwise lovely boyfriend of a month showed his true colors. He freaked out when he learned that I use tampons instead of pads. He yelled that using them is like cheating on him, because his penis is the only thing that should ever enter me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 877

You deserved it 5 658

The Top

Today, as a final effort to get me to lose weight, my recently deceased father left me $25,000 on his will, which is only to be released to me once I weigh 150 pounds. No exceptions. I'm about to lose my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 094

You deserved it 503

Today, I was dining out with some friends when a hot guy on the table next to us smiled at me. Flattered, I smiled back at him several times. On his way out, he laid a napkin with his number at my table. I didn't notice, too busy looking at the yellow dress and the pink pumps he was wearing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 599

You deserved it 6 735

Today, after being trapped in an elevator for 4 hours, I really had to pee. Just when I decided to pee in the elevator shaft, the lift doors opened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 016

You deserved it 1 152

Today, my front house window was smashed. A note was left, saying, "I want my cat back." I have no idea what they are talking about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 510

You deserved it 2 290

Today, I was at the airport. A creepy man smiled at me, so I politely smiled back. I then realized his shirt said "Smile if you take it in the ass." He then winked at me and walked off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 421

You deserved it 14 666

Today, my family and I discovered that my sleepwalking has escalated into sleep-raiding-the-fridge, after I woke up on my kitchen floor in a puddle of melted ice cream, surrounded by my parents, brother, and dogs. Apparently my recent dieting plans aren't going over too well with my subconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 100

You deserved it 4 326