Sex and Intimacy: Blown job - FML

Blown job

By Noname - 12/03/2009 09:30 - New Zealand

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 939

You deserved it 339 235

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Beam me up!

By saynotochrispine - 28/07/2009 04:15 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me that we could try living out one of his fantasies. When I showed up ready to go, he began playing the theme song to Star Trek and asked me to call him Mr. Spock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 299

You deserved it 7 946

By May - 04/09/2011 04:08 - United States

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend masturbating furiously. To Star Trek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 804

You deserved it 6 259

By Anonymous - 01/10/2009 05:56 - Canada

Spicy

Today, while I was getting it on with my girlfriend I accidentally called out "Mom" instead of her name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 484

You deserved it 44 063

Repetitive

By justgreat - 24/03/2012 02:30 - United States - Opa Locka

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while giving me head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 574

You deserved it 6 207

By NOKHAN - 25/10/2013 17:17 - United States - Durham

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I watched Star Trek Into Darkness together. He liked it so much that he's now chosen to yell "KHAAANNNNN!" as he cums. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 104

You deserved it 7 249

By eeh - 07/05/2009 14:45 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 638

You deserved it 103 434

The Force

By RobinBunny713 - 19/07/2011 03:23 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic moment when I made a Star Wars reference. I don't know what's worse, the fact that I said it or the fact that he seemed more turned on by it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 797

You deserved it 34 367

Timing

By Anonymous - 18/03/2017 07:00 - United States - Westerville

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a blowjob. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "What's that thing at the back of your throat called?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 583

You deserved it 1 182

Stuff

By BOO! - 25/05/2019 04:00

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head. When I came, she was scared of the "stuff" that came out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 213

You deserved it 396

By man - 30/10/2009 16:34 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend was giving me amazing head. I was really getting into it, when she looked up, and gave me a thumbs up. I can never take oral sex seriously again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 113

You deserved it 23 450

Next

Top comments

rebboy_2008 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 16:06

I don't know what's worse: the fact that you called her Spock or the fact that Spock was on your mind while getting a bj. Either way, you lose.

millycent 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 16:06

Why are you watching anything other than **** while getting blown? Or anything at all? Fail.

Comments

qwertyuiop8989 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 16:50

I'm just surprised that nerds who watch Star Trek can even get head in the first place. Thats impressive.

qwert5 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 16:50

This should read like this: Today, I was giving my boyfriend head while he was watching Star Trek. FML already but THEN he went ahead and called me Spock. FML

swhockey02 0

Thursday 20 May 2010 4:05

Rolf

DisappearingRose 18

Tuesday 10 August 2010 1:22

lmao so true.

CORNDOG200 0

Monday 18 April 2011 19:40

lol chya!

raenoleah 12

Thursday 28 April 2011 5:12

i think you mean "rofl". lol

frozen_heart 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 16:50

LMAO hahahaha

jSOPURE 3

Thursday 12 March 2009 16:54

Spock sucks ****! :)

maddog_fml 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 16:54

Haha! What's next? she blows you while she put a Dr. Spock mask and outfit on? Damn, I don't get it? A lot of men are in 7th heaven when they get blown, and you are watching Star Trek??

pmole42088 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 16:55

Retard

maddog_fml 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 16:58

Put = has

Blanche_fml 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 16:59

@ # 14 , or so this guy wishes.

Hullaballoo 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 17:08

You win for being a trekkie who gets head

monkeyspark 6

Thursday 12 March 2009 17:11

Lol at #20

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10

Keywords

Love Video games Gamers Health Weird Gross Smells First Dates Parents Technology Kids Annoying Jealousy Dogs Animals AITA Pranks Dreams Family Geek Relatable Gun control Money Amazon Birthday Cute Awkward Abuse Social Media Scams

The Top

Today, our company got hacked. Our secretary fell for someone badly impersonating the head of customer service and sent them a full list of employee information from one of our new clients. The boss wants to blame us in IT for not training her on how to avoid this. He fell for a phishing attack last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 496

You deserved it 78

Today, I met my boyfriend in Hong Kong after being apart for almost 6 months. We got to our room and got right down to business. I was just about to come when a voice came over the PA system in the room. "This is just a fire alarm test, sorry for any inconvenience." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 132

You deserved it 5 932

The Top

Today, I told my wife I wasn’t comfortable with her going out with an old guy friend. Petty, sure, but our sex life is non-existent. I found out that she's been seeing him behind my back for months, spent the night with him last week and claims there’s nothing going on. Trying to decide whether I should stay or go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 085

You deserved it 181

Today, I met my downstairs neighbor after she repeatedly banged on my floor as a way to quiet me down. I guess I'm not allowed to walk on my floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 829

You deserved it 1 342

Today, I was reading a romance story about a couple that fights, but gets back together and works out their issues. I was rooting for the breakup because I've become so cynical, I think forgiveness is weak and trust is for suckers. Yup, I'm now heartless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 857

You deserved it 470

Today, I argued with a boy from school over a girl. I didn't know he was a black belt judoka. I'm still in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 415

You deserved it 8 121

Today, I was diagnosed with a condition where blood vessels in my brain spasm just before orgasm, resulting in me getting a wicked migraine that lasts for days. The only cure? No more orgasms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 578

You deserved it 134

Today, my mom and I rented a hotel room. She decided to go to bed, while I watched MythBusters. Apparently, my mom got hot while she slept. She threw the covers off of herself and pulled up her night-gown. I turned to find out that my mother does not wear underwear when she sleeps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 046

You deserved it 4 042