Health: Bad timing

Bad timing

By lkvetched - 30/08/2016 17:23 - United States - Palestine

Today, I got food poisoning in the middle of the wilderness while hiking in a state park with my husband. I had to tend to nature several times before we reached our car. The only supplies I had was a bottle of water and a laminated trail map. It was part of an anniversary trip. How romantic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 996

You deserved it 1 048

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Same thing different taste

IBS?

By Anonymous - 27/04/2023 06:00

Today, I went on a hike. About two miles into the five mile trail, my stomach started to bubble and I realized there were no bathrooms nearby. My only options were to literally shit my pants or shit in a bush. Well, I shit in the bush and had no tissue to wipe. I hate having stomach issues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 747

You deserved it 141

I know where I'm going

By Anonymous - 18/11/2023 10:00 - Australia

Today, I went on a hiking date with my significant other. Trying to be adventurous and assertive, I suggested we take a shortcut through the woods. We got hopelessly lost and ended up spending the night in a deserted ranger station. Turns out, my idea of adventure is not quite as romantic as it sounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100

You deserved it 642

By kanmcdan - 22/04/2019 00:00

Today, my boyfriend and I went on a Snowshoeing date. I felt sick and suggested we turn back. He said I could wait in the car and continued on the date alone. He was gone for hours, while I was stuck alone in a national park with no cell reception, food, or water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 514

You deserved it 407

By monkeywrench - 30/08/2015 11:29 - Sweden

Today, I was hit by acute food poisoning while attending a colleague's birthday party at his home. The toilet had a door that wouldn't close all the way, there were only three sheets of toilet paper left, and I had to walk home through town, in a dress, with my soiled underwear in a plastic bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 965

You deserved it 1 783

By ekoblick - 17/06/2011 04:34 - United States

Today, I got food poisoning from my wedding food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 353

You deserved it 3 920

Hiking is so much fun!

By Sacho - 24/10/2019 20:00

Today, 4 miles into a mountain hike with my crush, I suddenly felt a stomach pain, followed by the urge for explosive diarrhea. I had to stand still with my butt clenched to prevent shitting myself. There were no nearby bathrooms, and I didn't have any toilet paper. It was messy. She'll never see me the same. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 790

You deserved it 167

City boy

By Where? - 23/08/2023 08:00 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I went on a hike with friends, but as I'm the worst outdoorsperson because I rarely venture outside of the city, I ended up getting lost in some woods after straying from our group. I ended up having to call 911 to be rescued. My friends will absolutely not let me live this ordeal down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 219

You deserved it 806

By Username - 11/08/2019 16:00 - United States

Today, I have a horrible hangover. My mom also decided it was a good day to go hiking. I ended up puking on the trail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 832

You deserved it 1 549

Close call

By Anonymous - 09/11/2023 06:00 - Canada

Today, I went on a relaxing nature hike to de-stress. I got lost for hours, encountered a bear, and had to play dead, only for the bear to steal my sandwich then sit there for hours before finally leaving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 537

You deserved it 144

By Sickofbeingsick - 01/10/2011 05:17 - United States

Today, after a week of staying in at night and fighting off a persistent cold, I was finally feeling well again, so I decided to go to my boyfriend's work BBQ. I got food poisoning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 856

You deserved it 2 841

crudeandrudeguy 29

Wednesday 31 August 2016 9:15

I don't remember seeing this muddy section on the map earlier... Uh...

OysterPearls 33

Wednesday 31 August 2016 9:39

Well this is how you know your husband the one: he'll still love you even after dealing with all your shit.

Comments

crudeandrudeguy 29

Wednesday 31 August 2016 9:15

I don't remember seeing this muddy section on the map earlier... Uh...

kimeatszombies 22

Wednesday 31 August 2016 9:20

Reminds me of that camping episode of Bob's Burgers. Don't eat raw trout, kids.

tounces7 27

Sunday 4 September 2016 21:50

What I hate is that restaurants can do this and get away with it all the time. There's really squat you can do when they don't follow safe food handling practices and poison you.

Seabass_Chan 33

Wednesday 31 August 2016 9:24

So... is the FML that you got food poisoning, that you got food poisoning on your anniversary, that your husband has a shitty (pun intended) taste in anniversary gifts, or all of the above?

MDoremis 38

Wednesday 31 August 2016 9:36

I don't really think this is all that confusing. It's bad all around.

mfmylifesrsly 29

Wednesday 31 August 2016 10:03

I personally would love that as an anniversary gift (minus the food poisoning, of course) and I'm not even athletic or do stuff like hiking.

Lalala579121 27

Wednesday 31 August 2016 12:44

It's because the food poisoning ruined their anniversary trip. Is it really that difficult to figure out? As for the "shitty taste in anniversary gifts", just because you wouldn't enjoy something doesn't mean others don't. And personally I think a walk/hike through the woods with nobody but my SO would be quite lovely.

OysterPearls 33

Wednesday 31 August 2016 9:39

Well this is how you know your husband the one: he'll still love you even after dealing with all your shit.

Lalala579121 27

Wednesday 31 August 2016 12:46

Well I don't really think this would qualify as dealing with OP's shit, unless she gets food poisoning on a regular basis.

soodytheboi 23

Wednesday 31 August 2016 12:11

No matter where you go hiking, you should always bring materials and/or a First Aid kit in case something like this happened. Be ready for the worst, even if it's extremely unlikely.

Lalala579121 27

Wednesday 31 August 2016 12:49

Especially if you're hiking somewhere you would need a map. Sure, state parks are a hell of a lot safer than hiking in the wilderness or backcountry, but you never know when something might happen when nobody is around.

1hardasswoman 10

Wednesday 31 August 2016 15:34

1hardasswoman 10

Wednesday 31 August 2016 15:38

katachristic 19

Wednesday 31 August 2016 16:16

Sucks that you got food poisoning, but you really should have been more prepared. At least you did bring some water and the map.

jtsmommy 11

Wednesday 31 August 2016 17:38

ALWAYS take a roll of toilet paper on hikes, preferably biodegradable or bring a plastic bag too. Sorry that your stomach ache ruined your anniversary outing though.