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  • Up and coming moderator

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    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
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  • Work is a 4-letter word

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  • One more and it's business time

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Blackcat5's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in an elevator with my brother and a woman. He signs to me that she has a 'damn fine ass'. I chuckle and then shake my head. He shrugs. A second later the woman signs to us, 'Rick, don't you remember me?' Turns out she helped teach my brother sign language when he was six. FML

By elevator-troubles - / Wednesday 18 March 2009 07:59 / Australia

Today, I was watching last week's episode of The Walking Dead with my girlfriend. When the gang leader explained the rules of the group to Daryl, I reached over, grabbed my girlfriend's boobs and yelled, "Claimed!" She shot back, "Yeah, they are. But not by you." FML

By the other guy? - / Saturday 29 March 2014 21:57 / Australia - Perth

Today, after finishing an essay at the library, I fell asleep and had a dream about the essay crawling out through my laptop screen and trying to kill me. I woke by the librarian shaking me and telling me to stop screaming. I was mortified. FML

By systematicpanic - / Thursday 20 March 2014 16:48 / United Kingdom - Leicester

Today, on my way to Burger King I got into a heated discussion with my wife about our cats. We have 15 rescues, and I've reached my limit. Guess what came running up to my car while waiting in the drive-through. We named him Pickles. FML

By cat whisperer / Thursday 20 March 2014 04:31 / United States

Today, while driving, I saw a dog run across the road. Feeling sorry for the pup on a cold, rainy night, I pulled my car over to pick it up. Once in, it started freaking out so I turned on the light. It was then that I realized I'd just put a wild coyote on my passenger seat. FML

By molliciousj / Wednesday 19 February 2014 05:09 / United States - Houston