skydawg5

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Skydawg5's favorite FMLs

By MissCan'tKeepAJob - 23/08/2011 16:18 - United States

Today, I work by myself at a retail store and I was bored so I called my boyfriend. I woke him up and he was feeling frisky, and as things were getting heated I started to moan and say dirty things. Until the entire rack of clothes fell over and revealed my boss hiding. He had a boner. FML

agreeclassic 22 138

vote type 1 57 648

Get a move on!

By Anonymous - 09/06/2011 02:00 - United States

Today, my mother set off the alarms at Walmart by shoplifting. She shouted at me to run, which I didn't. I had to get a ride home from the security guard, since my mother left without me because I didn't get to her car fast enough. FML

agreeclassic 50 671

vote type 1 5 150

Dad jokes!

By Chels - 11/05/2011 05:17 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my parents. They got quite drunk, and my mom shouted at him, "Have you had sex with my daughter?" As he was shaking his head, my dad said, "I have" in a really creepy voice, thinking it would be funny. It wasn't. FML

agreeclassic 68 573

vote type 1 5 335

By Anonymous - 10/05/2011 05:12

Today, I learned what a nail gun shooting my leg feels like. FML

agreeclassic 33 257

vote type 1 11 977

By MathTeacher - 02/05/2011 14:30 - United States

Today, after being annoyed one too many times by my students' whiney attitudes, I accidentally blurted out, "Quit being such a bitch," to the superintendent's daughter. FML

agreeclassic 25 082

vote type 1 46 139