Hollow321

dumb mother This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff United States

Not a science major

Today, my mother yelled at me for standing too close to the microwave. Her reason? The radiation was going to seep through, kill my sperm, and cause cancer. FML

104 comments

BoringFucker This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff United Kingdom

Gullible

Today, my girlfriend openly mocked me, calling me an idiot for thinking seahorses are real. She insists that they're like unicorns, and only exist in fiction. FML

248 comments

Anonymous 21 March 2012, 04:50 Canada

Today, I found a bug under my foreskin. FML

230 comments

displeased 5 April 2012, 06:47 Candler, United States 🌶️ Spicy

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is afraid of female orgasms. Right as I was about to climax, he panicked, pulled out, and ran into the bathroom. FML

128 comments

marisa 5 January 2013, 00:31 Carlow, Ireland

Today, I had to beg my husband not to shave his pubic hair into a handlebar moustache. FML

112 comments