closethomestucks

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Closethomestucks's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML

By The Sbeak - / Friday 13 February 2009 15:54 / United States

Today, my girlfriend opened my refrigerator and began her standard moan: "You're a pig, you never clean up. Look at that egg, it makes me want to throw up, it's gone black, it’s covered in fuzz, IT'S GOT HAIR ON IT!" I got up to check it out. It was a Kiwi fruit. FML

By opinaise / Thursday 2 August 2012 13:00 / France - Toulouse

Today, I was at work when a cute guy came up to me and said he liked my shirt. In a desperate attempt to say something back, I said, "Thanks, I like your shoelaces." FML

By anonymous - / Thursday 19 July 2012 22:31 / United States

Today, my wife, who is four months pregnant, burst into tears while thinking about the armchair in our living room that we never use. According to her, we're stopping it from living out its destiny as an armchair. FML

By FauteuilEver Alone - / Thursday 5 July 2012 08:11 / France

Today, I caught my stylist in the mirror attempting to get his colleague to laugh by spitting on my head while washing my hair. FML

By MonCoiffeurAdoré / Thursday 28 June 2012 02:43 /