dcheques

Anonymous · This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff ·United States

Life hacks for kids

Today, my daughter learned that if she rips a toy out of its package in front of a store employee, mommy will be forced to buy it. She now has two new toys today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 503 You deserved it 11 677

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B-rent · 18 March 2011, 16:10 ·United States

Smells like victory

Today, I discovered that the lovely, hunger-inducing smell that's been lingering around the office lately is from the local animal crematory. I've been wistfully inhaling the stench of burning cats, dogs, and other various animals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 066 You deserved it 7 093

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OyGeeze28 · 9 August 2011, 06:24 ·United States 🌶️ Spicy

I just work here, dude

Today, at work in a liquor store, a man came in to demand a refund because after he "drank the whole bottle of Jack" he "couldn't get it up" for his wife. He thought that alcohol was supposed to be an aphrodisiac, and blamed me personally for his "whiskey dick". FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 073 You deserved it 3 159

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