AmuletOfNight

Mr White Lake, MI, United States, United States 30 years-old

badwife 7 November 2009, 10:22 Japan

Today, my husband left his phone at home. I looked through his contacts and found a person named "The Bitch." Being very curious, I called "The Bitch" to see who it was. My phone rang. FML

155 comments

Dog fart This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff United States

It's a gas gas gas

Today, my dog farted next to my CPAP sleep/breathing machine. The machine sucked up her fart, compressed it, and promptly injected it up both of my nostrils. FML

223 comments