Today, while at work, a man grabbed my beard, said it was impressive, and then uttered the words, "I love you." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were snuggling and telling eachother nice things. The nicest thing he could think of to say to me was "Well, I see you shaved your mustache." FML
Today, I finally had a man say, "I love you" to me in a sincere tone. It was a customer, who was high, over the phone. I said it back. FML
Today, I was at work when a cute guy came up to me and said he liked my shirt. In a desperate attempt to say something back, I said, "Thanks, I like your shoelaces." FML
Today, while at work, a customer came up to me, stuck his finger in my armpit, then licked his finger. FML
Today, my co-worker handed me the phone and said it was my boyfriend calling, so I answered "Hello, Love!" It was my boss. FML
Today, I accidentally said, "Bye, love you," to a co-worker as I clocked out. Before I made it home, I had six missed calls and a long text from my co-worker professing her love to me. FML
Today, while at work, a creepy guy blatantly stared at my chest for a good 40 seconds. Finally snapping out of his trance, he said with a wink, "You forgot your name tag." He was right. FML
Today, I went to the store to buy some groceries. While I was at the store, an employee came up to me and said, "You're beautiful!" When I came home I told my husband what had just happened. My husband then asked, "What was wrong with him?" FML
Today, I was talking to a really cute guy. He leaned closer and I thought he was going to kiss me. Instead, he leaned back, laughed and said, "Wow. You're growing a mustache." FML
Today, I was stopped by a customer who told me that I looked like a nice woman. I thanked him for the compliment and pointed out that I was a man. With an obviously male name on my name tag. And visible facial hair. FML
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Top comments
UnearthlyEnemy 9
Grab his face, compliment it, then utter "but we cannot be together".
Semi_Interested 3
That man obviously knows whats up. Take it as a compliment.
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Comments (176)
eltapatio16 5
Is it as good as Brian Wilson's beard?
abbyhoneywaffles 11
Why are you repeating yourself?
twilightsoccer 5
I was waiting for the "and I'm a woman..."
RedPillSucks 33
me too. That would have been a real FML.
eltapatio16 5
Must of been very akward.
GawdamitNappa 4
*have. I'm sorry, but at least write must've if that's what you want it to sound like.
ryukk_fml 3
Dude, stop commenting.
redmane 21
*awkward. 50 - if you have the audacity to correct him, correct everything.
eltapatio16 5
Is it as good as Brian Wilson's beard?
kalgon 0
Cannot possibly be.
RaquelW 7
Blasphemy! Thou shalt praise no other beards before the beard of Brian Wilson.
Sexy_Smurf 16
That has absolutely cheered up my day.... funny sh*t.... take the compliment ;o) xx
chickenwalrus 14
said that already
laggy 4
santa? i love u too
Insane_Tea 15
Best FML ever.
wild_n_out 8
You must be new.
Insane_Tea 15
Actually I've been on this site for over a year now. I've even got a few comments thumbed up. I just find this FML fantastic because it reminds me of Epic Beard Man.
LadyLol_fml 15
Thats when you press your forehead to his and whisper 'I love you too'.
perdix 31
So, he's into Bears.
SuperNavi64 9
Hahahhahaha
yankfan89 27
Noor that is the best advice.