Today, while working at my lifeguard job, I noticed a girl bouncing on one foot over to the pool. Afraid she would trip, I whistled at her and yelled, "NO running or messing around on the pool deck!" She removed her towel, revealing her legs. Or leg, she only had one. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after jumping into a public swimming pool, the female lifeguard, who I have had a crush on for years whistled at me. When I got out of the water, she handed me the bathing suit I'd apparently lost. FML
Today, I went to the university pool. There was this cute lifeguard there, and every time I got out of the water I saw her looking at me, so I walked up to her and asked if everything was OK. She told me she thought I was going to drown. FML
Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML
Today, my friend and I decided to go skinny-dipping in her pool just after we'd finished watching a scary movie. While we were in the pool, I heard something move in the bushes so I freaked out and ran onto the deck, slipping and falling flat on my back. Her dad saw the whole thing. FML
Today, I was at work lifeguarding and saw a kid drowning on the far end of the pool. I decided running would be the quickest way to get to her, but as I ran across the pool deck I slipped and hit my head. The kid's mother jumped in to save her child and then called an ambulance for me. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, in my lifeguarding course, I had to pull a 200-pound boy out of the pool in an exercise to practice using our legs when lifting. I, being only 90 pounds, tried pulling and ended up falling into the pool, landing with my lady parts on his face. FML
Today, I decided to get back in shape so I went swimming. I only managed 10 lengths and was completely out of breath. I was so embarrassed that when a lifeguard asked me if I was OK, I made up a story about a leg injury as a reason to leave only 15 minutes after I got in. FML
Today, at the pool, I tried to impress the hot lifeguard by doing the perfect dive. Afterward, I realized my shorts were floating through the water. FML
Today, I took my 4-year-old daughter to the local pool for swim lessons. As we walked onto the deck she turned to me and said "Mom, that lady has really big boobs!" The whole pool heard, even the man my daughter was referring to. FML
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Top comments
caancoha 0
Well, you went out on a limb.
lab2lb 0
i hope you kept an eye on her. i would not have fun trying to swim with one leg. poor girl. FML has turned into FAUX PAS CITY
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Comments (106)
binaryalice 0
don't be that bitch lifeguard. assess the situation before you have a piss fit.
binaryalice 0
don't be that bitch lifeguard. assess the situation before you have a piss fit.
MTBowen11191993 0
Its not a big deal. You were doing your job and its not like anyone expects a one-legged person to jump into a pool and start swimming.
Hockeylover87_71 0
so, it's not your fault, you were just doing your job, and besides, it's not like you could see that she was actually missing a leg, and not just hiding it
_qwerty__fml 0
As a lifeguard the op could have been responsible for the lives and safety of a hundred people at that one moment. Do you really think he was going to count the limbs of each and every one of them before telling them to follow the rules? And for you people that think lifeguards yell too much, we yell so we can be heard, and we yell so we can be taken seriously. It's not a power trip, we're trained to see the worst case scenario of every safety situation.
Malibufoxx 0
Ahaahhahhaa..........that's horrible but funny
O_D_I_N 0
Why the Hell would she be swimming if she only had one leg?
wowmissysings13 0
i have one leg and i swim, surf, skate, and do everything people with two legs do so for all u people saying stupid comments about why she would be swimming with one leg, maybe u should think before u speak. we can do anything anyone else can do
Chocolate_Chunk 2
except sitting cross-legged
Lolzords 11
Aww, you beat me to it.
Suicidalpotatoe 0
Anyone who put ydi is stupid he's doing his job and how often do one legged people go swimming