Today, I got so drunk that I tasered myself in the balls as a joke, fell down my friend's porch stairs and rolled out into the street. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML
Today, at a house party someone smashed and spilled their drink. In my own drunken state, I decided to get the mop as someone might fall. I then fell over it and ended up with glass in my side. FML
Today, while sleeping over at my guy friend's house, I woke up mid-air after falling off his abnormally high loft bed. Luckily, there was a table and 3 shot glasses to break my fall. FML
Today, I was out having a beer with a few friends. After getting a pint, I slipped in a puddle of beer, fell on top of a stranger on the sofa, and knocked my beer upside down on my head. Then, completely soaked, I realized I'd also knocked over the table, spilling its content on a poor girl across it. FML
Today, I got too drunk at a party and cracked a tooth from opening a beer bottle with my teeth, farted something nasty in a room alone with someone, tried to climb a tree and fell out, and watched my crush make out with his new girl. FML
Today, I tried to impress a group of friends by jumping a set of stairs on my skateboard. I didn't realize the ceiling dropped down towards the bottom of the stairs and knocked myself out. FML
Today, I woke up in hospital after a night of heavy drinking. My friends told me I was beat up by the doorman. After going to the club to watch the security footage, it was revealed I actually fell on my face trying to fight, and caused more damage to myself. FML
Today, while mildly tipsy, I threw myself onto my bed at a weird angle and somehow managed to somersault off my bed and land in my clothes hamper. FML
Today, I woke up with my face covered in blood. Turns out that yesterday at my colleague's birthday party, I got so drunk that I started yelling "Nappy time!" before falling out of my hammock and face-first onto the concrete ground. FML
Today, I was at a friend's party and tried to lean casually against a wall while talking to someone. I missed the wall and ended up stumbling backwards into the punch bowl that was atop the coffee table. FML
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Top comments
Tpracingkg 15
Darwinism
theherd 4
Bye children!
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Comments (155)
alwayswinning123 7
You sir are a moron
Cheeley 17
Not so funny now is it?
BlueMoonCafe 12
I don't understand how this could be anything other than a "YDI."
cosmosis 12
When your a moron like OP. Your life is truly ******!! Whats more surprising is that he survived long enough to learn what a taser is and how to use it. Well done OP. You sir are a *******.
MidnightOne 3
Stupidity *should* be painful.
jgriff79 23
Can't fix stupid!
Joe9024 20
Not even with duct tape..
DasHaas 9
That's what you get when you get "so drunk".
error404n0tf0und 21
you sir, know how to party!
Joe9024 20
I can usually party hardy without getting a taser to the testes, but that's just me
buddy51 23
OP- Please, for the love of humanity, understand how VERY FUNNY it is for all your friends to see you taser your balls!! Repeatedly!!! Go for it!!
DudeEvil 22
You think that's bad, OP? Wait till you see yourself on youtube. *fingers crossed*
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
Should probably cross dicks too, just to be safe.
friedchickenpie 14
Go home, OP, you're drunk
LennyComa 39
I recommend, If your balls can even still function, not reproducing as your genes are defective and the future doesn't want them