Today, I backed into an expensive SUV only minutes after my boss congratulated me for being the only employee to not wreck a company car. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I hit my boss's car. It's only my second day on the job. FML
Today, while I was backing out of the my work's parking lot, I hit my boss's truck. While he was in it. FML
Today, I dinged my boss's very expensive car. My car wasn’t damaged, so in a panic, I moved my car to another spot and said nothing. Less than an hour later, my boss showed me high definition security footage, so now I either cough up repair money I can’t afford, or I get fired. FML
Today, I proudly drove my new car to work, feeling on top of the world. As I parked, I noticed everyone in the lot staring at me. I smiled and waved, thinking they were admiring my car. It wasn't until I got to my desk that my boss informed me I'd dragged an orange traffic cone under my car the entire way to the office. FML
Today, I backed my car into a parked car in a parking lot. Not only did I back into a parked car, but it was the ONLY parked car there. FML
Today, I got to my underground parking garage at work and saw my boss pulling into a spot. I thought I would show him my reverse parking skills and decided to park beside him. As I was pulling in he opened his door to get out and I smashed into it, nearly running him over. FML
Today, I discovered that as thanks for my successful efforts to increase my company's monthly revenue, my dumbass of a boss has been awarded a pay bonus. He's wasted no time telling everyone about the sports car he's planning to buy with it. FML
Today, I parked in my "employee of the month" parking spot by the front of the store and started my shift. About halfway through my shift, a customer backed into my vehicle, got out and checked, then drove off before I could come outside. Perks of being the best employee I can be. FML
Today, I snuck out of work 2 hours early. As I was speeding away so I wouldn't be seen, I rear-ended my boss as he was leaving the lower parking lot for a late lunch. FML
Today, I was trying to do a nice thing and let my friend's mom borrow my car. I went to move my mom's car that was parked behind me so that I could get my car out, and then proceeded to back into my dad's new company car. FML
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Top comments
walkingspastic 22
It's not your fault, the man clearly jinxed you! I mean you had a perfect track record before he brought it up!
bettyc4 26
He should have knocked on wood.
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Comments (47)
Googolman 29
It looks like you wrecked your relationship with your boss.
walkingspastic 22
It's not your fault, the man clearly jinxed you! I mean you had a perfect track record before he brought it up!
MrConcise 35
"There's no such thing as an accident." The boss planted a psychological seed of destruction. OP was just the vessel!
grajax 24
Well, looks like you really crushed your reputation in that aspect.
dragon0313 9
I'm sorry that happened to you op. FYL
1dvos_grl3 21
Oh the irony.. Hope you don't get into too much trouble.
bettyc4 26
He should have knocked on wood.
LOLouis_fml 24
Before OP knocked INTO metal.
woainishamu 21
Your boss jinxed it!
alkoy 4
now he probably thinks you did it on purpose :)
abNormal62 23
Well at least you got the recognition before you got the blame
brandoneyez1 25
Your boss has a sharp tongue. Next time he should talk how long it's been since you got a raise.