Today, I decided I would actually make use of my apartment complex's exercise equipment. My routine consisted of one mile on the treadmill, and 15 minutes on the toilet followed by 10 minutes of lying in the fetal position on my bath mat. Great core workout. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I decided to work out. Being too embarrassed to run in public, I instead ran in circles in my basement. FML
Today, trying to get into shape because I run out of breath after walking more than 30 minutes, I started to hit the gym. Too bad my legs didn’t want to cooperate and decided that it would cause limping-worthy pain for every step I took on the treadmill. FML
Today, I started doing cardio at my local gym with a basic exercise bike because doing weightlifting by itself wasn't having an effect on my weight. Since I'm out of shape, I did 15 minutes instead of the standard 30. I had to stop at 10 minutes because my legs were so sore they nearly gave out on me when I stood up. FML
Today, I went to the gym for the first time in quite a while. I was feeling pretty good about myself until I realized I'd been on the elliptical machine for twenty minutes without having actually turned it on. I was just moving the pedals and wondering why I wasn’t getting tired. FML
Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML
Today, I was doing my usual routine at the gym which consists of working out on the treadmills right in front of my ex boyfriend to make him feel bad. Whilst doing this, I tried to be cool and do that thing where as the treadmill slows down you turn around and just walk off the end. I fell. FML
Today, I was feeling really good about going to the gym for the first time. That was until I got so worn out from my “warm up” on the treadmill that I had to go home and spew. FML
Today, I finally started exercising. I'm a rather obese person and I'm super pumped up to finally get off my lazy butt and lose some weight. Locking myself in my room, I first started with a very simple exercise: jumping jacks. I farted each time I jumped. I jumped 10 times. FML
Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. On my way home, my legs gave out halfway up the stairs to my apartment, and I had to awkwardly sit there until I could crawl the rest of the way up. FML
Today, I had a weird dream I woke up on the bathroom floor at my local gym. Turns out it wasn't a dream, and I passed out from "overworking myself". I was on the treadmill for under 5 minutes, walking. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
fifi125 21
That's one mile more running than if you hadn't gone! Think positive!
strugglingatlife 14
Hey at least you ran a mile! Never give up!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (44)
ThirteenThirteen 27
Hope you feel better!
TeasinDaNoobs 16
Keep on workin OP! It gets better!
IvenVlex 14
Yeesh, if you keep doing that you might lose pounds indeed.
fifi125 21
That's one mile more running than if you hadn't gone! Think positive!
alex_the_tiger 14
Gotta start somewhere, at least now it can only get better
vikky538 29
the movement matters ...whether its bodily or a bowel.. hope you feel better and thumbs up for going to gym..don't quit...
otecasacid 22
Nothing speeds up metabolism like exercise!
elizabeth4166 16
And food
tac0609 13
At least you tried. And 1 mile is pretty good
strugglingatlife 14
Hey at least you ran a mile! Never give up!
siggy_mcsigx 22
Take it easy in the beginning! The best of us can get nauseous from pushing after we haven't done anything active in a while. Do quarters of miles and work up from there. Go slowly and stretch in between...keep hydrated but don't drink *too* much water. Remember to breathe. :) And maybe do simple aerobic gymnastics instead of constant jogging. Unless you're a cross country runner, constant jogging on a treadmill is pointless and it is v hard to lose weight that way, let alone build muscle tone (other than in the calves). Good luck :)
ZoroMiHawk 25
+1
SideOfTheAngels 23
Yikes! Hope you feel better :) Also hope you find out exactly how one correlates to the other. Surely it couldn't have just been the treadmill?