Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I joined a gym. I’m overweight and not very athletic, so I was nervous. I looked around and tried a treadmill. I start walking at a chill pace, then got ambitious and cranked it to a "light jog." Within seconds, I tripped, fell, and sent the emergency stop button flying across the room. The gym staff ran over and I swear someone said, “Well, at least he’s trying.” FML
Today, while on the treadmill, my iPod fell and shot out underneath my feet. I got off to get it, and when I tried to get back on, I slipped and fell on my face on the moving track. The whole gym watched me get beat up by a treadmill and clapped when I finally got back on. FML
Today, I was at the gym and I tripped on the treadmill. Not only did I fall off the machine, I also managed to knock over two other people's water bottles and send them flying across the room. FML
Today, I was doing my usual routine at the gym which consists of working out on the treadmills right in front of my ex boyfriend to make him feel bad. Whilst doing this, I tried to be cool and do that thing where as the treadmill slows down you turn around and just walk off the end. I fell. FML
Today, I went to the gym for the first time in quite a while. I was feeling pretty good about myself until I realized I'd been on the elliptical machine for twenty minutes without having actually turned it on. I was just moving the pedals and wondering why I wasn’t getting tired. FML
Today, I got on a treadmill for the first time. I was running at a very high speed. I needed a break but didn't know how to get off. I decided to just let the machine take me to the edge so I could get off. I was thrown off the treadmill and landed with my happy sacks crashing into a dumbbell. FML
Today, I was feeling really good about going to the gym for the first time. That was until I got so worn out from my “warm up” on the treadmill that I had to go home and spew. FML
Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. As I was on the treadmill, I accidentally hit the emergency stop button. In my attempt to play it cool, I tried to pretend it was intentional and yelled, "I've reached my fitness goal for the day!" FML
Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. I was so out of shape that I couldn't even finish my warm-up. FML
Today, I had a weird dream I woke up on the bathroom floor at my local gym. Turns out it wasn't a dream, and I passed out from "overworking myself". I was on the treadmill for under 5 minutes, walking. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Soon those two minutes will turn into twenty. You are putting the effort in, which is more than a lot of people can say for themselves.
hotheadslav 17
Don't worry about being overweight and going to the gym. At least people can see you are actively trying to pursue a goal. Keep your head up OP! :)
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Comments (173)
Welshite 40
Soon those two minutes will turn into twenty. You are putting the effort in, which is more than a lot of people can say for themselves.
octinate 17
Yes, most people don't even start exercising, they always put it off and keep putting it off. Well done for doing the first step and actually giving it a go!
Arwen_Evenstar 37
Yup. And it's surprising how many people wouldn't be much better, even if they look slimmer.
UhHuhHoney 20
Exactly!
cheeeksss 29
I agree. Every second and every step is only pushing that much closer to your goal. Keep going because no one started at the top. We all start from the bottom and work our way there (:
LilHitla 15
Op try doing it while watching television, it can make time seem to go by faster.
ichdprodigy 12
OP- I wouldn't recommend jumping straight in like that. Begin with walking, then move to walk run intervals, and finally to longer runs. Also, other cardio machines such as bikes and ellipticals allow you to mix it up a little. Hop in a pool of you can find one. And if you truly want to change, weight is lost in the kitchen. Just remember to never take it to extremes, if you feel you need a rest day, take it. To truly and completely get rid of fat, you must make it a lifestyle. Finally, SET GOALS! Set goals of a 2 or 3 pounds a week. It's a healthy rate to lose weight while remaining noticeable in your body quickly. :) good luck!
WasabiMars 21
#1 is right OP. Remember that the most difficult part about this is not the exhaustion from working out. The most difficult part is convincing yourself to get up and go to the gym. Because once you have set your mind to regularly working out, 30 minutes or more of cardio will feel refreshing instead of exhausting.
AnOriginalName 19
95, a goal of 1 pound per week is a much more reasonable goal. It takes a deficit of 3500 calories to burn a pound of fat; at a pound per week, that's still a 500-calorie deficit every day. And even that relatively small deficit is very mentally tough to maintain. It's important to set ambitious goals, but it's just as important to set realistic goals.
NoMapToBuy 14
You aren't useless OP, its definitely easier long term and short to build up to the hard things but you have already overcome the first and hardest part. Keep to it and it will only get better from now - there are people everywhere who can help. All the best
nikkipettyfer 24
Don't give OP!
turquoisee_fml 12
Don't give OP what?
DARKDAY07 16
herpes
Crossing 17
Don't give as in don't give up OP #62
Frammy007 7
#82 - I don't get why people are down-voting you. It's generally good advice not to give people herpes, especially if they're trying to make a change to live a healthier life. I agree totally, we shouldn't give OP herpes. That would be horrible. OP - keep it up, eventually it'll be easy and you will be healthier to spend more time with your loved ones.
Xerxes249 6
In Dutch this is more funny
Demon_of_Light 27
Keep going OP! You've done the hardest part - actually beginning. Most people never get there. Follow through with it, and remember that you are strong and you will push through this!
meli1195 31
don't worry OP, everyone starts off somewhere. All those super fit people didn't come out of the womb like that, you just need patience and determination to accomplish your goal
organizse 28
As long as you keep at it, it will get easier and easier!!!
british_bad_luck 14
Remember how you felt when you realised how unfit you were. Use it to motivate yourself
MrSassypants 34
You need to listen to "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey while working out or doing anything difficult. It really does wonders. Or "Eye of the Tiger."
Exodiafinder687 58
Or "Push it to the Limit" from Scarface.
Vestin 18
For working out in general, yes. For running in particular nothing can beat Yakety Sax (aka "The Benny Hill theme") ;P.
Tessa_11 19
i listen to Eye Of The Tiger when I work out alot XD and Carry On (Wayward Son) lol
Frammy007 7
Queen - Don't Stop Me Now and Mulan Soundtrack - Make A Man Out Of You
lil_ham1644 29
Or chariots of fire makes any run much more triumphant.
ohSNAPyall 27
Beastie Boys.
Ichiya 29
Pop in some Beiber and you will enjoy running as long as you imagine you're escaping that Hell.
laden_swallow09 35
The Final Countdown - Europe Push It - Salt n Pepa Supermodel - RuPaul Macho Man - The Village People Holding Out for a Hero - Bonnie Tyler Big Blue - F-Zero OST Corneria - Star Fox OST Final Boss Fight - Yoshi's Island OST Guile's Theme - Street Fighter II OST Be My Lover - La Bouche Too Much Booty in the Pants - Soundmaster T Shake Your Booty - KC & the Sunshine Band Everybody Dance Now - C&C Music Factory I'm So Excited - The Pointer Sisters Stop! In the Name of Love - The Supremes The Bad Touch - Bloodhound Gang Pump Up the Jam - Technotronic Any 90s dance tracks, really.
Vegetarian27 24
I like to watch an action movie with really fit people. That's always good motivation.
Demon_of_Light 27
"Marshall vs. the Machine" from How I Met Your Mother is also a good running song
Clioo_fml 17
Looks like I don't even have to compile a new work out playlist for myself anymore
ktm71125 19
Keep doing it OP, it will make you feel better about yourself. Do what you can no matter how short it is
frerik 9
keep fighting op dont let you get down :)
GrimReefer66 29
Hey, at least you tried. You had the power to go lose some weight, it may not be easy at first but you'll make it :)
vikky538 29
that's a good start OP..never look at the time you run on treadmill just look at how intensive it is..I am sure you will make progress if you keep continue going to gym..