Today, my cellphone was stolen. I work in a morgue. By myself. Obviously it wasn't stolen by any of those people. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my phone got stolen at church. FML
Today, I'm at work as a security guard. At a morgue. Why am I here? FML
Today, I seemingly misplaced my cell phone but didn't have time to look for it before work. This evening, my cell phone company calls me to tell me I have six hundred dollars worth of calls to El Salvador that I have to pay for. My cell phone was not misplaced, it was stolen. FML
Today, I got mugged at work. The sad thing is I'm a cop and was trying to catch the people who mugged me previously while off duty. FML
Today, I got mugged. As the guys who took my purse were about to walk away, my cellphone rang in my pocket. FML
Today, I left my phone at work. After returning to the office to retrieve it, I noticed it was not on my desk as it usually is. I went to the front office and found it on the desk, unattended. When turning on my phone, I was greeted by my new lockscreen: a crap someone took in the bathroom. FML
Today, while I was taking a break at work, someone stole my iPod from my desk. I work in a police station. FML
Today, I was entertaining people during an extra curricular school function in order to help "brighten people's spirits in their time of need." After it was all over, I found out that my phone had been stolen. FML
Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on the subway. FML
Today, I was working at the Soup Kitchen handing out special christmas dinners to the homeless. At the end of the day I collected my things and went home. It was only then I discovered that my wallet, phone, pager and (for some reason) my glasses has been stolen. FML
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Top comments
naem 0
Did you cut anyone open today? It's probably in there
Sevenfold 0
wtf? How do you think someone stole it? You LOST it, idiot.
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Comments (128)
naem 0
Did you cut anyone open today? It's probably in there
posampo 0
jackass crew you suck at this, stop picking fml's and go back to being idiots who only entertain other inbred idiots
genius_man16 1
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
YDI for being a woman
posampo 0
ah dont moderate my stuff, I'm right, they are all inbred
stronascurge 0
excuse me? your an ass btw, this fml is freakin hilarious. nicely worded
beardo8 0
YDI FOR TRYING TO MAKE A LIVING
alexxss_fml 10
lol nice.
Laxer21 0
well damn you got a problem.
Brendan3693 0
51 YDI cause you still live in the 1800s.
Agent_Buckwald87 0
Why is this on FML?
seb12992 0
I take back the comment I made in another FML. What was the jackass crew thinking with this one?
riax 9
It's here bcoz a corpse stole her phone!!!
BlerbFace306 0
this is NOT an fml...you lost your phone, what does that possibly have to do with working in a morgue??
xHaniffax 0
YES, but that's not funny.
likeOMGwow 0
uh i agree. that's not even really a joke. just dumb. this FML is sorta dumb..
safirestar09 0
But the OP still feels bad over losing their phone. C'mon, people, this is not the only "my phone is lost/my phone has been stolen" FML on here.
Stoffer69 0
So basically, your phone was stolen and the rest of that was pointless information... F my life for wasting a few seconds trying to understand this one.
GR3453m0nk3y 4
exactly im still kinda lost in this it was obviously posted by a six year old and obviously moderated by six year olds (and the jackass crew) (which i have nothing against) but rly guys; bad pick
transilvanianson 3
agreed
kitties_fml 12
...?
uhmfml 0
This site needs a "who cares?" button. This was stupid...
Antivirus_fml 0
I 100% agree
_julia 0
i second that
gurksperma 0
Definitely!
mavsfan26 5
I agree completely.
sk8rchick97 0
I fourth that
Madlax_fml 0
Zombies!!!!!!! O.o
authorkid 2
lol
bberg01 5
you're a believer too.
mooleelee 0
Maybe they wanted to play zombies vs plants on his phone
khatuba 0
obiviously?
lil_ham1644 29
I'm picturing the kitten in your pic saying that. Makes it 10 times better
xHaniffax 0
WTF? this is stupid.
iFruit 0
You probably lost it in one of those body bags, have fun looking for that!