Today, my cellphone was stolen. I work in a morgue. By myself. Obviously it wasn't stolen by any of those people. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my phone got stolen at church. FML
Today, I'm at work as a security guard. At a morgue. Why am I here? FML
Today, I seemingly misplaced my cell phone but didn't have time to look for it before work. This evening, my cell phone company calls me to tell me I have six hundred dollars worth of calls to El Salvador that I have to pay for. My cell phone was not misplaced, it was stolen. FML
Today, I got mugged at work. The sad thing is I'm a cop and was trying to catch the people who mugged me previously while off duty. FML
Today, I got mugged. As the guys who took my purse were about to walk away, my cellphone rang in my pocket. FML
Today, I left my phone at work. After returning to the office to retrieve it, I noticed it was not on my desk as it usually is. I went to the front office and found it on the desk, unattended. When turning on my phone, I was greeted by my new lockscreen: a crap someone took in the bathroom. FML
Today, while I was taking a break at work, someone stole my iPod from my desk. I work in a police station. FML
Today, I was entertaining people during an extra curricular school function in order to help "brighten people's spirits in their time of need." After it was all over, I found out that my phone had been stolen. FML
Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on the subway. FML
Today, I was working at the Soup Kitchen handing out special christmas dinners to the homeless. At the end of the day I collected my things and went home. It was only then I discovered that my wallet, phone, pager and (for some reason) my glasses has been stolen. FML
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Top comments
naem 0
Did you cut anyone open today? It's probably in there
Sevenfold 0
wtf? How do you think someone stole it? You LOST it, idiot.
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Comments (128)
Hoax_fml 0
Stolen, lost, same difference. Might wanna tone down that paranoia.
Horrorshoworange 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Why do you exist?
bexox 0
Because her parents ******. Any more questions?
yake12 0
^ win
Crusadent18 16
Sir you win the Internet for today
Sevenfold 0
wtf? How do you think someone stole it? You LOST it, idiot.
polkadot1453 0
this is a terrible fml. as in, its stupid. its not an fml. its not funny.
alex_vik 1
...Big ******* deal.
Flounder 2
I guess I don't understand your point here. Are you trying to suggest that someone outside of work did it? If so, why bother mentioning you work in a morgue?
sireen 0
I don't get it.
irishdubr 0
City morgue u kill 'em we chill 'em
DorkusD 0
My history teacher used to answer the class phone with, "City morgue, you stab 'em we slab 'em." Thank you for reminding me of that haha
meef4554 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Awful fml what the **** is a mourge or watever u said
yake12 0
^ win
lil_ham1644 29
Where dead people are kept basically. They could be there for medical reasons, legal reasons, or whatever else people use dead bodies for
flinkpamingo 0
THAT is too funny. Maybe they're hiding it. Better do a cavity search. I KNOW THAT WAS BAD GALLOWS HUMOR!! Sorry if I offended you. It probably just got caught in a sheet or bag. Did you try calling yourself?
flinkpamingo 0
OOH yeah! Or if it was in a prepared body that had already been sewn. Or dressed. Or in a funeral service. Way too crazy!
GR3453m0nk3y 4
hahaha thatd be funny; like if the OP called himself and the phone rang while inside some dude during his funeral
flinkpamingo 0
I ALMOST lost a foil covered bandage in a sucking chest wound when I was a newbie. Got it in time, but it's never happened again. WHEW!!! TAPE! TAPE! TAPE!
hiitisbrooke 28
yeah would it be great if it rang and you heard it coming from the ground? ;P
sorta_sarcastic 12
24- what is she going to use to call her "stolen" phone?
lil_ham1644 29
There is probably a company or departmental phone she could use.