Today, I went to my local pharmacy. Walking in, the security guard rudely asked me what I was going to buy. I brushed him off and walked in. I was paying and told the cashier what happened. She said, "Sorry, we get a lot of hobos, they tend to steal." FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I went to the drug store to pick up some Monistat for a yeast infection. As I was leaving the store, the security alarm went off. The attractive security guard asked to see my receipt, smiled, told me I looked nice, so I handed him the receipt. His face then abruptly changed to a look of disgust. FML
Today, I went to the drug store to pick up a few things. After looking for condoms for 15 minutes, I asked the cashier where I could find them. She said they keep them behind the counter due to theft. She refused to sell them to me, because they're for customers who might actually need them. FML
Today, while bagging my groceries at a store, a lady came over to me, took a good look at the food I'd bought, picked out an item and put it in her bag. When I confronted her, she called security on me and told them I wanted to steal her stuff. I got thrown out and she walked away with a smirk. FML
Today, I was shopping with my husband. At the self-checkout, one of the items I was buying for him as a gift didn’t register. As we were walking out, I get stopped and escorted to the loss prevention office, where I was accused of stealing. FML
Today, I was at the supermarket when an elderly lady asked if I'd grab some coffee for her from a high shelf. The moment I took my hands off my almost-full shopping cart, she made off with it. I ended up getting thrown out by security after she claimed I was trying to steal it from her. FML
Today, at a self-checkout, I scanned all my items, bagged them, and left. Only when I got outside did I realize I had completely forgotten to pay. I then noticed that security was running to stop me, and I had to explain that I wasn’t a thief, just an idiot. FML
Today, I went to the store, but after I'd selected my items, I saw that I'd forgotten my wallet. When I tried to explain to the cashier, he thought that I was trying to steal and called the cops. My roommate had to come to the store to save me. FML
Today, I had to admit that I desperately need anti-anxiety medication. Apparently, when you walk around a grocery store avoiding eye contact and generally acting "sketchy", management will call the police on you, who will then pat you down to be sure you aren't shoplifting. FML
Today, I was at Wal-Mart where all the aisles had been moved. An elderly woman asked me where the pet products were, so I told her that I didn't know, but showed her where they could be. An hour later, she came back with security. She'd told them I'd purposefully gotten her lost. They threw me out. FML
Today, while shopping, I was grabbed and dragged off to a security room with no warning. Apparently, the way I was dressed and walking was suspicious. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
xxmollyxx 25
Maybe you should invest in some nicer clothes, and/or a hair cut?
alakomonus 0
that is messed up
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (94)
fistnazal 10
wait. hold on.. you miss-took (however you spell it??) a hobo for a security officer?? ..either that security gaurd missed out on life grooming lessons or that hobo had himself an AWSOME find at the local salvation army!
talun 10
No? The security guard mistook OP as a hobo.
fistnazal 10
right. gotch ya. I posted a comment explaining that I didn't read that right. sleep deprivation is been my friend for far tooo long. I hope you can find a space deep within your heart to forgive me. aaaah don't eat meeee!!
UnicornsDoExist 0
LMAO I thought the same thing at first! hahaa.
talun 10
Forgiven?
pennies_lane 6
what was it, your missing teeth? your tattered clothes? the funky smell? or the trolley full of belongings?
thrAsHeRr9081 16
He mistakes you for a hobo, and you brush HIM off? I'm confused.
savage74012 0
what kind of pharmacy has a security guard? you need to get out of the ghetto!
FFFFFUUUUU 0
What kind of pharmacy doesn't have a security guard? I know that every one I have been to has one and I don't live in the ghetto
theFMLiest1ofThe 0
really? I've never seen a pharmacy with a security guard. not even when I worked in the bronx
dani_c 0
probably plainclothes guards then. many of the pharmacies and walmarts where I live have those instead of a fully decked out cop
kweenbitch 0
:D I'ma BX baby myself...& nope, no security! we handle dat shyt ourselves!
syed121417 22
Many pharmacies have security guards, not only the ones in "the ghetto". As of nothing bad can ever happen and security isn't needed in stores outside what you define as such.
ThatGirlIsMe93 0
lol
MaJiN_fml 2
you just got owned
KittehSayzRAWR 0
Lol, owned.
lovexbox 8
Don't dress like a hobo then.
akwes 0
dang
FukYurLife_89 0
no the op was just embarassed kuz they went for crab medicine. lmao
DocBastard 40
What's the security guard going to do, subdue you with the CVS circular? "Stop, thief! Listerine is on sale for 2.99!!"
payton3233 0
lmao. win.
naximus93 0
Ahhh Doc, you never fail to make me laugh.