Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when I saw my best friend. I jokingly did a double-take and said I didn't recognize him with his clothes on. We laughed, talked a bit, then went our separate ways. My girlfriend later dumped me, claiming I'm blatantly gay and cheating on her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when a girl came out of nowhere, screaming at me for cheating on her, and saying she was dumping me. I've never seen her before, and she was almost grinning during her little act, but my girlfriend believed it, and I'm now single. FML
Today, my girlfriend slapped me and dumped me because she thought I was gay, simply because I had to miss a date because one of my guy friends was in a car accident, and I went to see him at the hospital. FML
Today, my supposed "best friend" started going out with the girl I'd just split up with, immediately after she said she wanted to see other people. FML
Today, I told my best friend she looked great in the dress she was wearing. My boyfriend overheard and is now convinced I'm a lesbian. FML
Today, after weeks of summoning up the courage to come out of the closet to my best friend, I told her I was gay. Immediately after she started cracking up, thinking it was a joke. I was so confused and nervous, I went along with it. She still thinks I'm straight. FML
Today, I had a friend "dump" me over Facebook. She apparently thought we were dating. I'm a gay man who's lived with his partner for 5 years. She says I have commitment issues. FML
Today, I introduced the girl I was talking to my best friend, and we all hung out. Until this day, her and I were doing great. After my friend left, she started gushing about how hot he is. He wasn't hitting on her at all. I reminded her that, and that he has a girlfriend. She was calm, but visibly upset. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, saying I was immature for making gay jokes all the time. A few hours later, I got six texts and three calls from guys I didn't know. It turns out, she put my name and number on Craigslist as a gay man seeking a relationship. FML
Today, I was walking around town with the girl I have loved for four years and have been 100% faithful to. A girl thought it would be funny to approach me and pretend she was the girl I was seeing, and that I was cheating on her. My girlfriend believed her and broke up with me. FML
Today, I found out that my friends were convinced that I was gay. I have known most of them for 3 plus years, they all thought my girlfriend was a special shopping partner. I found this out while announcing my engagement. FML
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Top comments
XandraHart 15
I think that's a win if she can't take a joke
cOOkiEzRgOOd 22
She should learn to take a joke, it's friends like those you want to keep and girlfriends like her who you're better without!
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Comments (57)
JoseTheSmexican 11
Sounds like either she cant take a joke or she ised that as an excuse to break up with you either way sorry Op.
momof3honeybee 13
Sounds like she was looking for a way out.
MyNameIsLaughter 18
She's so insecure she thought you were cheating on her with a guy? I personally thing you dodged a bullet OP
lexiale 10
You're better off without her OP, people without a sense of humor are no fun
Xeebar 28
I hate people with no sense of humor. If she dumped you over something this dumb, you don't need her bro.
jeff_boles 12
That's a dick move.
yerawizardlizzy 27
Got it the first time, dude.
Liamwme 9
At least you still have your Bromance man.
UncleCaitlyn 21
I don't think saying its a joke not a dick don't take it so hard works very well in this situation
LoZelda123 20
It's ok man. at least you have the bromance to fall back on.
shitstorm28 11
Kind of sounds like she's crazy and you're better off.